WWE Raw Preshow Notes 3/9/15
– It’s Otunga, Corey Graves and whatever his name is at WWE HQ… They talk the Arnold Classic and put over all the WWE stars and attractions in attendance over the weekend…
– We learn that Brock Lesnar IS in the building tonight and he will address his future with WWE!
– Moving ahead to a video of last week’s Jon Stewart & Seth Rollins segment. Randy Orton ‘accidentally’ allows Stewart to kick Seth in the balls… Ouch. We also get a clip of Reigns vs. Rollins from last week where Orton aids Seth in a win. The panel talk tonight’s Raw, it’s Reigns vs. Rollins AND Orton in a handicap match.
– We go over the current Cena/Rusev storyline. You know, the one where Cena doesn’t have a match at WrestleMania… I’m sure a 3 year old somewhere believes that…. Anyway, Cena has to make Rusev give him a title shot at Mania… But how will he do it??? We’ve got Rusev defending against AXELMANIA tonight on Raw!
– Quick clip of Bray Wyatt burning a casket last week. Wyatt now has the Urn with him. Will the Undertaker respond this week???
– IC Title discussion. The title has been jumping from star to star without actually changing hands. Stardust added his name to the list last week on Smackdown. Renee Young interviews Bad News Barrett backstage. We learn that Barrett will face Daniel Bryan tonight. Didn’t they do that last week? Barrett talks about everyone stealing his IC Title, how everyone steals it because they can’t beat him. BNB is upset he was forced into a multi-person ladder match at Mania. Barrett plans to find and retrieve his title tonight.
– The panel chats up what Brock Lesnar may say or do tonight on Raw. And Bold Predictions take us home… The tease the Undertaker possibly appearing tonight… He needs to….
The WWE Raw Report 3/9/15 from the CONSOL Energy Center in Pittsburgh, PA
– Opening video reminds us of Randy Orton aiding Rollins in a win over Roman Reigns last week… Raw kicks off with Randy Orton heading to the ring. We’ve got Big Show, Kane, Seth Rollins, and J&J Security awaiting him in the ring. Kane welcomes Randy Orton back into the Authority after proving himself last week. Big Show gets heel heat and Show has to acknowledge the ‘ignorant people’. Big Show puts over Randy Orton and shakes his hand.
Jamie Noble speaks next, Orton bends over to meet him at his level… Noble starts to accept Orton, but Jamie changes his mind, he says Orton can’t be trusted…. Seth Rollins mocks Jamie Noble and says Jamie will be fine. Rollins asks Mercury if he backs Orton, Mercury has nothing to say…. He’s not sold either… Rollins acknowledges the obvious storyline, stating the fans think Orton is tricking him and will turn on him, but Seth doesn’t think so, Orton has proven himself…
Rollins spends time bashing Noble, bashing the Big Show, mocking them with jokes at their own expense for some reason… Then Rollins welcomes Orton home. Seth tells the fans to stand up and show respect for Randy Orton.
Randy Orton finally responds. He appreciates all the kind words, but he wants to know what has happened to the Authority and why they’re kissing ass now. He wants to know if Kane is the devil’s favorite demon or favorite or the devil’s favorite dumb ass? Which is it, kicking ass and taking names, or kissing ass and making coffee?
Orton says Big Show should be the most dominant man in the company, but instead he’s the biggest bitcher and moaner. From most dominant to most pathetic.
Orton asks why Jamie Noble despises him. Is it because people know who Orton is? Is it because Orton can get on all the rised at Disney Land and Noble can’t.
Orton turns to Mercury, then just walks past him… Nuff said. lol
Orton gets in Rollins’ face. Orton tells Seth he will make him his bitch when he feels like striking. “RKO” chants follow. Orton then says he’s just screwing around and has a laugh with Seth Rollins. Seth buys it as a joke and he talks about their handicap match against Roman Reigns tonight. And that’s what is best for business…
– Daniel Bryan on his way to the ring to take on Bad News Barrett after the break!
–Commercial Break–
1. IC Champion Bad News Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan
Non-title and no title for BNB. R-Truth on commentary once again. Lots of back and forth as this match gets going. Bryan lands a nice double underhook suplex. Bryan tries the dropkick in the corner but runs into a big boot from Barrett…. BNB strikes Bryan repeatedly in the head with knees before sending Bryan to the floor to take us to break…
During the commercial break the match continues on the App with Barrett in control outside and back inside the ring. Bryan eventually does a back flip out of the corner and takes over with the sit out clothesline…. YES kicks to the kneeling Barrett follow, and Bryan plants the last one upside Barrett’s head for a near fall. Bryan tries for the YES LOCK, but Barrett gets to the ropes, and we’re headed back to USA.
Back from break, Barrett is back on offense with Bryan pinned in the corner. BNB lands a top rope SUPERPLEX for a near fall… Truth continues to have fun on commentary. The announcers note that Truth has a burlap sack with him. Back in the ring, Bryan almost steals a win with a crucifix. Moments later, Barrett misses a clothesline and Bryan lands the running knee and this match is over in 7:08…
– Following the match whole Bryan celebrates, Barrett lays him out with the BULL HAMMER…. Dean Ambrose’s music then hits and he meets Barrett in the aisle and lays Wade out… Ambrose is in action next!
–Commercial Break–
– WWE App interview with Stardust, who currently has the IC Title. The usual Stardust stuff here.
2. Dean Ambrose vs. Stardust
While not the champ, Stardust does have the IC Title with him. I don’t know if this is where Goldust is factored in or not. R-Truth still on commentary. Lots of back and forth to begin, Stardust lands a gourd buster, but Ambrose retaliates with a dropkick up against the ropes… Stardust comes back and does same random cartwheels and weird things, so Dean slaps him… lol…. Dean clotheslines Cody to the floor and lands a suicide dive… As Ambrose tries to get back in the ring, Cody goes after his knee and takes over control as we head to break…
During the break on WWE App Stardust works the bad leg of Dean. Ambrose escapes a half crab, but Cody tosses him to the floor. Cody tries to throw Dean back into the ring, but he does one of those gymnastic spinny move things and flings his legs back to the floor and levels Cody with a clothesline…
Back from break, Dean fights off Stardust in the ring. Bulldog out of the corner. Ambrose goes up top but somersaults off to avoid a charging Cody. Stardust goes for Cross Rhodes, Dean escapes and lands his clothesline from out of the ropes, and then DIRTY DEEDS ends it in 7:27.
Dean Ambrose grabs the IC Title after the match, but he’s soon attacked by Wade Barrett… Then Daniel Bryan attacks Barrett… Out next is Luke Harper, then Dolph Ziggler… We’ve got 6 guys brawling in the ring, and R-Truth sneaks up and steals the IC Title as he puts it in his burlap sack.
Cross Rhodes to Ambrose, Ziggler superkick to Stardust, spinning clothesline from Harper to Ziggz, running knee from Bryan to Harper, BULL HAMMER to Bryan once more… Now Wade goes out to confront R-Truth for the title belt… Truth gives it up right away…. Well, actually Truth gives up a burlap sack, no doubt there’s no title inside….
Truth slinks away up the ramp with the real title, Barrett opens the sack to reveal a TOY replica IC Title belt!
– WWE Hall of Fame announcement… This week’s induction goes to Connor Michalek, as his family will be receiving the “Warrior Award” which was inspired by the Ultimate Warrior last year…
–Commercial Break–
– WWE App interview with the New Day. It’s very creepy… Very stupid… We learn that they will meet Cesaro & Tyson Kidd tonight. Their attempt at comedy is just…. weird… and bad. I don’t even know WTF was going on… This was embarrassing, I can’t believe Vince allows this gimmick to continue…
– We’ve got Paul Heyman in the ring, he speaks for a moment and then we get a Roman Reigns interview and video that airs. Following the video, Heyman introduces WWE Champion Brock Lesnar who is indeed here… Heyman calls the Reigns interview propaganda and bullshit. Heyman mockingly puts over Reigns accolades and trashes his Samoan family as savages and brawlers. Heyman claims if Reigns doesn’t win the title at Mania that he will be dumped from the Anoa’i family. Heyman says tough for Roman, because Reigns ain’t winning, Brock ain’t losing.
Heyman acknowledges the possibility of the Authority even screwing them, just to get the belt on Reigns, so that Rollins can cash in and win it, because Rollins isn’t beating Brock…
Heyman mentions the potential of a Brock Lesnar screwjob, but says that Brock will kill anyone involved in the screwjob. Heyman’s mic goes out again like last week, Heyman talks trash and dares someone to come out and take the mic from him or the belt from Lesnar…
Heyman says Brock is going to do whatever he wants… If he wants to unify the WWE & UFC titles, then so be it. If Lesnar wants to kill Pacquiao and Floyd Mayweather, then he will… Heyman says the WWE Title no longer belongs to WWE, but Brock Lesnar.
Heyman talks about Brock killing the Rock, killing Cena, killing the Undertaker and his streak. What do you think he will do to Roman Reigns? Another great promo from Paul, but can’t believe Lesnar gets paid to just stand there.
– Bray Wyatt promo backstage. WrestleMania is almost here, where is the dead man? Bray Wyatt begs the Undertaker to find him… TONIGHT!!!
–Commercial Break–
– On the App we’ve got Kane & Big Show introduced in the ring.
3. Ryback & Erick Rowan vs. Big Show & Kane
These 4 guys are in the Andre Battle Royal. Kane & Ryback start off. Ryback with lts of power stuff early, including a spinebuster. Ryback charges with the meathook clothesline but runs into a big boot from Kane… Tag to Big Show who spears Ryback dead… Show beats on Ryback for a bit and tags to Kane. Kane takes over but Ryback counters a suplex and tags to Rowan. Erick beats on Kane, and lands a back elbow from the middle rope for 2… Big Show distracts but gets knocked to the floor. Ryback comes in but is held back by the ref, so Show tries to sneak and whack Rowan with the KO Punch, but Rowan moves and Show KO’s Kane instead… And Rowan covers while Ryback lays Show out on the floor with meathook. The faces win in 3:25. Crowd was fairly dead for this entire thing.
After the match, Show and Kane begin to argue when Stephanie McMahon interrupts and scolds them. She says they represent the Authority and WWE but they’re letting them down… She says she doesn’t know where the monster and the giant are but she wants them back… Steph then screams for them to get out of her ring…
Kane says he and Show can work this out, but Steph tells them to pack their crap and get out of the building, and they can’t come back until they understand what’s best for business… No idea where this is going, or why… Perhaps to get them out of the arena for the main event?
– We get another look at Miz’s erectile dysfunction commercial and the aftermath where Miz slaps Sandow.
– Back to Raw, The Miz is backstage. He says he can rap with Wiz Khalifa. The Miz & Wiz… Khalifa says he likes Miz, but he doesn’t think he can work with him because of the commercial. Instead, Damien WIZdow, yes I said WIZdow is hired… Sandow is dressed gangsta style son… Sandow raps a promo at Miz and announces he’s in the Andre Battle Royal… Woot!
–Commercial Break–
– Sheamus Returns…. Fella…
– Wiz Khalifa performs in front of his hometown.. And he has a John Cena shirt on… Now this is how you use your WrestleMania TV time wisely right here. Beats Adam Rose or Los Matadores however… Damien Sandow comes out to celebrate with Khalifa after the performance ends.
– We go back to last Monday, Brie Bella saves Nikki from losing the Divas title to Paige. The Bellas attack Paige, but AJ Lee returns! Now we’ve got a tag match set for Mania…
– WWE App promo from Sin Cara who announces he’s entering the Andre Battle Royal.
–Commercial Break–
– The Bellas are in the back when Byron Saxton catches up with them for an interview. They talk about being the only Divas in the Flinstones movie. They rip on AJ & Paige as they plan to knock them back to the STONE AGE at Mania… Yabba Dabba Doo…
4. AJ Lee (w/Paige) vs. Summer Rae (w/Cameron & Eva Marie)
AJ on top first, big dropkick. Summer takes back over with the usual Summer stuff. AJ comes back, neckbreaker and a DDT gets 2. Crowd is pretty dead again here. AJ runs into a shitty pinning kick from Rae for 2. Some form of sloppy as miscommunication from Summer that ends with the Black Widow for AJ to get the win in 3:12.
None of the other Divas get involved (thank God).
– We’re going to hear from Sting for the first time ever on Raw, next… Seriously? You announce it right before the break? You could have sold that as a selling point for the show… I hope it’s not a video…
– WWE App interview with the Usos. They namedrop a bunch of tag team names and want the titles back. We learn Nattie vs. Naomi takes place tonight. Joy, another Divas match. Hey, I’m willing to give Divas a chance, just so long as it’s the RIGHT Divas… Summer Rae, not so much.
–Commercial Break–
– Sting interview time… Ugh, it’s a frickin video. Really? And it’s not even Sting’s voice. It’s Ole Anderson… No, not really… But it’s not Sting’s voice… WTF is this shit???? Sting can’t even cut his own promo????? “Sting” talks about his loyalty to WCW, how he tried to save WCW, and how WCW had a broken Authority. This guy pretending to do Sting says he’s been waiting 14 years to face HHH, whose only loyalty is to himself and not the company. Wow, that was TERRIBLE…. Holy crap that was stupid.
– Backstage, John Cena runs into Rusev. Rusev reminds Cena that he will not accept John’s challenge. Cena isn’t here to ask for a shot. He talks down to Rusev’s actions, how he’s using the U.S. to accomplish goals while bashing it at the same time. Cena DARES Rusev to go out to the ring and say one more word about America and he will take him out tonight!
–Commercial Break–
– Zack Ryder interview on the App. He is having issues with Adam Rose. Rose and his Rosebuds interrupt. Rose presents Ryder with a printout of Ryder’s Mania moment, which was of Eve Torres nailing him in the balls… Lame.
5. US Champion Rusev (w/Lana) vs. Curtis Axel
AXELMANIA is running mild this week. Man Pittsburgh crowd SUCKS… Axel still has the Rumble time clock up, 42 days and counting. Rusev attacks Axel as he tries to get into the ring and lays him out before the match can start… Axel pulls himself up wants to continue, he tries to fight back but gets his face kicked off… Accolade… And it’s over in like 25 seconds… Sorry brother.
– After the match Rusev wants the microphone but Lana tries talking him out of it… Rusev gets the mix for himself. Uh oh… He says Axelmania represents every American because he is pathetic and he lives in the past. He says America is spineless, if we had a spine it would be made of Jell-O, our heart would be made of disease, and if we had a soul then God would spit on us… WOW, damn, that was harsh… That’s some Vince writing right there…
HERE COMES CENA… Cena takes Rusev down immediately and locks in the STF… Cena rocks the STF back and keeps pulling until Rusev passes out…
Cena grabs a bottle of water and dumps it on Rusev to wake him up. Then he puts Rusev BACK in the STF lol… This time Rusev taps… Lana starts begging on the mic to let Rusev go. Lana agrees to the US title match at WrestleMania if Cena will let Rusev go. Cena releases and smiles down at Lana. Rusev is laid out as Cena looks down at disgust. Cena gets his match at Mania.
– Backstage Bray Wyatt is standing with the urn. He says he can’t wait much longer… Tonight, he raises the dead… FIND HIM!
– WWE App has the Prime Time Players cleaning the Andre Trophy because they both think they’re winning. A Prime Time Players video follows.
–Commercial Break–
– Backstage, Rusev is being checked out. He begins yelling at Lana in Russian or whatever. They argue, obviously over her accepting the title match challenge. Rusev sends her off…
6. Tag Champs Cesaro & Tyson Kidd (w/Natalya) vs. The New Day (Woods & Big E w/Kofi)
Non-Title. New Day seem to think they’re getting a title shot at Mania… That would be bad for business… Crowd is deader than earlier, and for good reason with New Day out there. Big E manhandles Tyson. The crowd is literally silent. Kidd gets a blind tag to Cesaro, who comes in and clips Xavier from behind to take over. Woods comes back, almost knocks Tyson into Nattie on the apron, Kidd puts on the brakes, but Woods drops him with an inverted powerbomb for the win in 3:30. Crowd is DEAD for the finish and the win….
The Usos come out to accompany Naomi to ringside for her match next, the Usos exchange looks with the New Day in the aisle…
–Commercial Break–
7. Naomi (w/Usos) vs. Natalya (w/Tyson & Cesaro)
This match gets started on the App during the break. Nattie has control early, but Naomi drops her in a weird jawbreaker thingy to take over. Naomi with a rest hold. Nattie with a rest hold, and this booking has killed the crowd, at least for the preliminary stuff. Pittsburgh has never been a great rasslin crowd anyway, at least not in recent decades. Back from break, Naomi misses a corner splash and Nattie lands a slingshot ass drop. The two girls trade pins and do the Steamboat/Flair bridge spot. Nattie catches Naomi’s foot and drops her into the split and kicks her down. Sharpshooter time, but Naomi somersaults under and Nattie takes a bump back into the buckles… Tyson checks on Nattie while an Uso dives off the apron onto an interfering Cesaro… Naomi plants the Rear View butt butt and gets the win in just about 5:00.
A pissed off Natalya starts up the ramp with Tyson’s half of the WWE titles… WTF? Tyson and Cesaro chase after her and now Los Matadores come out for there match against the Usos… Matadores pass the champs in the aisle… WTF is this, ECW? When do they ever do this? LOL… Actually, I like it, it shakes things up, but it’s just so random. And maybe we could get some better matches, eh?
8. The Usos (w/Naomi) vs. Los Matadores (w/Torito)
Primo does the head stand in the corner and stands off with Jey Uso. We go to a break. The match continues on the App. Usos eventually get a Matador in their corner and take over. Flying head scissors on Jimmy Uso gives the Matador brief control, but Jimmy comes back with some nasty chops and the App feed ends… Back on USA, the Usos have control. Crowd just doesn’t care, this booking has killed them for now. Jimmy misses a superkick and gets dropped on the middle rope. “CM PUNK” chants begin. Crowd has obviously seen enough. Matador with a f-ing armbar… R U KIDDING ME???? Double underhook suplex on Jey gets 2. Matadors with some double team, but Jey & Fernando collide. Double hot tags. Jimmy right off the top with a cross body for 2. Spinning head scissor into a DDT from Diego gets 2. Diego off the middle rope right into a superkick, but Fernand breaks it up. Fernando slides outside and Jey dives right out onto him… Jimmy inside with a Samoan Drop on Diego. Torito up on the ropes to distract, Diego shoves Jimmy into the midget and knocks him to the floor. Diego with a heelish rollup that gets the Matadors a win for the first time in forever. 8:30. Way to long. Torito is scooped up from ringside and carried away. Damned Colons!
– Backstage with J&J Security & Seth Rollins. Noble tries to warn Rollins not to trust Orton, but Seth knows Randy is with them 100%. Seth asks how stupid Randy would be to lay out the plan and tell Seth about it earlier tonight. J&J has a bad feeling about this. Seth says he masterminded the split of the Shield, the return of the Authority, he knows what he’s doing.
–Commercial Break–
– Bray Wyatt is out in the ring to resurrect the Undertaker… He never sleeps, but he’s always dreaming. Dreaming of the world the way SHOULD be and not the way it is. Destruction and Chaos, the buzzards guide him, he follows them and when he reaches them he sees a shell of a man, the mighty Undertaker. Pride is Bray’s favorite sin, and pride led him to the Taker. He doesn’t want to worship Taker, he wants to walk over his broken bones to claim the throne. He is the NEW face of fear. He says the people USED to fear Taker, but this was preordained, Wyatt was chosen to replace Taker. The cruel hands of fate stole Taker’s destiny, but Wyatt can give it back to him. He says Taker will be resurrected, and put down permanently at Mania. Wyatt taunts the Undertaker to show up.
Wyatt has the urn on a table in the ring. He mocks Taker’s power coming from a simple jar, and laughs… Wyatt opens the urn, looks inside, but nothing happens. Wyatt laughs as he sets the urn back down… The urn begins smoke! Lightning on the titan tron… Bray Wyatt BEGS for Undertaker to show up. He wants him…
GONG!!! The lights go out. GONG!!! GONG!!!
A spotlight shines in the center of the ring, the table and the urn have disappeared and been replaced with Wyatt’s old rocking chair!
GONG…. A stupid “I Accept” style text appears on the Titan Tron, it read “the Man comes around”, more Johnny Cash propaganda. WTF is this, Sting all over again? We hear the Undertaker’s voice “You will rest in peace”, which is likely from stock footage… lol… But at least it was Taker’s voice…
Lightning strikes the middle of the ring, causing Bray Wyatt’s rocking chair to catch on fire… Wyatt is stunned at first, but then begins to laugh. The match is set.
Wow… that was ummmm… Bad.
–Commercial Break–
Okay, so it’s 11pm and Roman Reigns is just now coming to the ring.
Handicap Match
9. Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins & Randy Orton (w/J&J Security)
Rollins starts things out for his team at 11:04pm. Reigns uses some power stuff early but Seth comes back with some decent stuff. J&J yell at Orton for not taking advantage of a down Reigns, Orton clocks Jamie Noble. Rollins sends J&J to the back and says he and Randy have this… Reigns comes back but the crowd is pretty dead and don’t seem to like Reings, notice the pattern. Rollins gets taken down and goes to tag Orton, but Randy backs down the steps. Seeth asks Randy if he’s playing around and Randy flips him a pair of birds. First middle fingers I’ve seen on Raw in years… Orton stands there as Seth turns into a SPEAR from Reigns, and Roman wins in 4:08.
After the match, Orton stalks Rollins. Orton slaps Rollins around and takes it out to the floor. Clothesline outside. Rollins gets whipped right into a barricade and camera man. Crowd likes it but for the angle the crowd still sucks. Orton beats Seth around ringside with steels steps and such. Orton sends Rollins into the crowd and follows him with a steel chair. Orton beats the crap out of Seth with the baking sheet sounding chair. Orton tells Seth he’s gonna show him who he is. Back to ringside, Suspended DDT off the barricade! THIS.. CROWD.. SUCKS.
Orton sets up for an RKO, but then looks at the announce table and flings Seth over it and Rollins flies into the barricade. Up on the table now, Randy Orton with an RKO on Rollins through the table… Of course NOW the crowd finally pops.
Orton tells Rollins he has only just begun. Randy walks off as Raw goes off USA.
We move over to the Network where emergency services are placing Seth Rollins in a neck brace and on a stretcher.
– We also get treated to a John Cena interview from backstage. It’s just your basic stuff, the chase for the title, representing and defending America, etc… Cena plans to bring the title back to the US.
