WWE Raw 8/17/15 Preshow notes
– Show kicks off with Stanford, Graves and Otunga. Otunga shows off a pic he took with Chrisley, Steve Harvey, Geraldo and Rancic. Graves says he doesn’t even know who those guys area. Jesus. Pointless.
– We move on to talk Brock vs. Taker. They’re both in the building tonight don’t ya know. We relive the brawl from Raw a few weeks ago and the panel hypes the fact that these two could collide again tonight without proper security measures.
– Back to last week, Ryback returns and drops Big Show and kills Miz. They’ve got a Triple Threat IC Title match at Slam. I’m sure Miz is loving being stuck in this instead of working with Amell in the tag match. The Miz joins the show via phone. Miz puts himself over and then we learn it’s Miz vs. Ryback, non-title, tonight.
– Did you know Stephen Amell was agile and had hops? Well, if you saw Raw last week you found out. Amell defended himself when he exploded on Stardust last week and now we have a tag match of Amell/Neville vs. Stardust/Barrett for Summer Slam. Amell calls in via phone. He is still all about his match at Slam though he admits he knows very little about being in the ring. Cody and Barrett have a special message for Amell tonight. Goody.
– Seth Rollins broke this guy called John Cena’s nose a few weeks back. Maybe you heard about it. Cena returns tonight for the contract signing for the match with Rollins’ at Summer Slam. Is it me or have they been doing these contract signings to death lately?
– Sheamus vs. Orton is set for Slam now. Because we can never get enough of this match. #sarcasm . It’s Orton & Cesaro vs. Sheamus & Owens tonight.
– Plus Sasha Banks vs. Nikki Bella tonight.
The WWE Raw Report 7/17/15 from the Target Center in Minneapolis, Minnesota
– Please no Seth Rollins…. Aaaannnd we open with HHH and Stephanie… Sigh. I blame myself for not being more specific.
The Authority Talks Summer Slam
Stephanie shamelessly shills the WWE Network and Summer Slam, which is 4 hours. They start to run down the Slam card. HHH hypes Taker vs. Brock. Steph tries to hype it but the video screen shows Cena vs. Seth and it throws her off, lol… Anyway, Cena vs. Rollins contract signing tonight per the insistence of Seth Rollins. Reigns & Ambrose vs. Wyatt & Harper. HHH announces it’s Harper vs. Reigns tonight… Stephanie mentions the Divas 3 team Elimination match at Slam. HHH says there are NINE matches but apparently those are the only matches that matter.
So after stealing the show last week TWICE I guess it’s F-U Randy Orton as far as importance goes. lol
Stephanie then announces that Jon Stewart will be hosting Summer Slam!
Apparently Randy feels as pissed off as I mentioned as he cuts them off for his tag team match to kick off the show. The Authority leave the ring as we prepare for what could be a really good match.
— Commercial Break —
1. Randy Orton & Cesaro vs. Sheamus & Kevin Owens
Owens immediately avoids Cesaro and tags in Sheamus. So Cesaro tags in Orton. Fans chant “You look stupid” as Sheamus tells them to “respect the hawk”. Sheamus runs from Randy early and often in between feeling each other out. Owens tags in. Orton goes to tag in Cesaro but KO cuts Randy off. Orton still drop Kevin and tags in Cesaro. Owens fights it, but Cesaro lands an impressive delayed suplex. “Cesaro” chants as he nails KO with a springboard spinning European uppercut… So smooth… Owens bails as we take a commercial break…
Back from break, Sheamus hits Orton with a rolling senton. Then Owens follows up with a senton splash for 2 on Randy… KO then knocks Cesaro off the apron while the heels work over Orton. Orton drops Owens on the floor outside and crawls for a HOT TAG TO CESARO… It’s Sheamus & Cesaro now with Cesaro landing all sorts of flying uppercuts-o-doom… HIGH CROSS BODY, Steamboat style, by Cesaro on Sheamus for 2… Sheamus gets to the ropes to prevent the Giant Swing. Sheamus comes back with a tilt-a-whirl powerslam on Cesaro. Sheamus goes to the top rope but dives right into a MASSIVE UPPERCUT… DAMN, that’ll break yer jaw like you’re shitty Geno Smith… Cesaro with a near fall… Cesaro blows a spot landing on the apron, lol, but still lays Owens out with a big boot on the apron. Sheamus doesn’t realize Orton has made the blind tag. Suspension DDT from Orton on Sheamus, and the RKO ends it in 13:02.
Some good solid stuff from Cesaro here, but in general everyone saved their big stuff for Summer Slam. Nothing too “spectacular” and actually most of their signature moves weren’t even used. What could have been an excellent match turned out to be just average… But that’s not a complaint. It’s smart booking. Summer Slam is in 6 days, they saved their stuff for Slam. Makes sense to me. Hated to see Sheamus lose here though, makes me fear for Randy at the PPV. This was the definition of a TV match.
– Undertaker speaks next.
— Commercial Break —
– In a backstage promo. We hear the druids chanting as the Undertaker’s shadow walks out of a purple light and into the screen. He says when the Reaper calls your name, it’s just over. The Gates of Hell are opening and welcoming Brock to his eternal damnation. Brock’s name has been called, and at Summer Slam Lesnar will never Rest in Peace. Just a quick 60 second promo to hype later.
– Backstage with Seth Rollins and the Authority. Steph is holding the contract, Seth can’t thank them enough for making this happen. Seth has one more favor. After he beats Cena at Slam, he wants a statue erected of him at WWE Headquarters like Andre, Bruno, and Warrior. Steph agrees if he beats Cena he deserves a statue.
– Dean Ambrose to the ring to play cornerman for his Summer Slam partner Roman Reigns. Roman then follows. See, these guys are such great friends they require completely different entrances… Ambrose joins commentary!
— Commercial Break —
2. Roman Reigns (w/Ambrose) vs. Luke Harper (w/Bray Wyatt)
As mentioned, Ambrose is on commentary. Ambrose jerks a chair out from under Saxton and rolls it over to Wyatt. The slobber knocker begins. Harper controls early, Reigns winds up clotheslining Luke to the floor and nailing him with an apron dropkick on the outside as we head to commercial…
Back from break, Harper has control after laying Reigns out with a running dropkick during the break. Harper with a Michinoku Driver gets 2… Reigns breaks a chinlock with a back suplex, but Harper comes back with a BIG BOT FROM HELL takes Roman’s jaw off like he’s shitty Geno Smith. Reigns escapes another chinlock and makes the comeback with clotheslines-o-plenty. Harper comes back with a knee to the face but Roman lands a waistlock suplex. Nice. Harper gets knocked to the floor again and Reigns lands a running clothesline off the apron. Back in the ring the two men struggle for control and Harper is becoming REALLY lethargic, not sure if he’s hurt or what. Harper tries to block Roman but still eats a Samoan Drop. Reigns gets 2. Roman calls for the Superman punch, but Harper bails to the floor. Roman follows him out and walks right into a SUPERKICK from Luke. Harper goes for a Suicide Dive, but dives right into a SUPERMAN PUNCH from the floor… Nice… Reigns rushes back in after Luke but runs into the spinning side slam from Luke for a near fall. Harper tries a Powerbomb, Reigns escapes, but Harper with a second SUPERKICK AND A SIT OUT POWERBOMB BY HARPER!!!! 1……………2……………………………Reigns kicks out. Luke sets up for the discus clothesline but runs into a SUPERMAN PUNCH and an IMMEDIATE SPEAR finishes Luke in 15:00 even.
After the match, Bray Wyatt enters the ring and drops to his knees. He speaks with a down Harper and laughs. He tells everyone to follow the buzzards. Apparently he doesn’t care when his unit loses. lol
Good TV match. Again, they held back some but still delivered most of their usual stuff and it was a decent match. Harper got really slow at one point and both guys looked plodding briefly early on after the break but they got back into the groove and finished strong. Perfectly fine for a TV match. No complaints. Would have liked to seen Ambrose and/or Wyatt get involved post match, but I get not wanting to beat a dead horse with post match shenanigans. Especially since I have no idea what all they have planned for the rest of the show for the other matches.
— Commercial Break —
3. Tamina (w/Team BAD) vs. Becky Lynch (w/Paige & Charlotte)
Wow, Tamina’s going to work a singles match. Tamina dominates early with her power. Good swinging side slam by Tamina. Becky finally takes over briefly and lands a missile dropkick for a near fall. Tamina back in control heel style, but Lynch is able to to counters into the Dis-Armer and the big monster Tamina is forced to tap out in 4:00 even. Crowd was blah for this match, and there was never a reason for them to care.
I’m all about this Divas revolution, but WWE needs to understand that the good matches were in NXT and thus sticking these girls in the ring with the likes of a Bella, or Naomi, or Tamina is not going to work. These NXT girls are levels better than these established WWE girls, save for Paige.
— Commercial Break —
– Last Monday Rusev made Mark Henry look like a bitch, and then Summer Rae killed Lana with the Accolade.
4. Rusev (w/Summer Rae) vs. Mark Henry
Lana is on commentary. She says she has a plan. Hmmm. Henry is out next with the American flag again. How can you even take this seriously after last week? It should be noted that Rusev has the BULGARIAN flag. I guess Russia just disappeared off the map. Henry takes control early, Rusev powders but Henry follows and continues to beat him down outside. Henry with a nice pair of layout bodyslams in the ring gets 2. Back to the floor Rusev sends Henry face first into the ring post, twice. Rusev then yells at Lana before dropping Henry with the jumping side kick. Henry tries to block the Accolade to no success, and Henry taps LIKE A BITCH in 2:48. Sad.
– Rusev and Summer begin to leave ringside, but Lana enters the ring and screams for Summer to come back. Lana calls Summer out and the crowd eats it up. Now remember, Lana has a plan. Lana slaps the shit out of Summer and knocks her down.. Then LANA CHALLENGES RUSEV… Now remember, Lana has a plan. And apparently the entire crowd knows what it is as there’s a LOUD Ziggler chant…
AND HERE COMES DOLPH ZIGGLER…. WITH DARKER HAIR… YUCK
ZIGGLER WITH A TORNADO DDT ON RUSEV!!! Ziggler goes for the Superkick, but RUSEV PULLS SUMMER IN FRONT. ZIggler pulls the kick back before connecting… THEN LANA SUPERKICKS SUMMER INSTEAD!!! RUSEV THEN EATS A SUPERKICK FROM DOLPH….
The heels are all pissy in the aisle while Ziggler and Lana make out. So does this make 10 matches for Slam?
— Commercial Break —
– Jonathan Coachman will be hosting ESPN Sportscenter outside the Barclay’s Center this weekend to hype SummerSlam. I like Coach much better on ESPN. Happy for the crossover, so many ESPN fans complaining. Apparently they didn’t watch ESPN from like 1986 through 1993 when wrestling was on 5 days a week… Bitches.
– Backstage Jojo interviews Lana and Dolph Ziggler. Ziggler wants a match added to Summer Slam, Dolph vs. Rusev.
– A very long video hyping Taker vs. Brock is shown with several wrestlers commenting throughout. We learn that Brock Lesnar’s Homecoming will take place in the ring later tonight.
– IC Champ Ryback to the ring for action with the Miz.
— Commercial Break —
5. IC Champion Ryback vs. The Miz
Ryback’s return match. Non-title of course. Big Show on commentary, Show has a new movie releasing tomorrow called Vendetta. Miz on the mic before the match, mocking Big Show for being a wanna-be actor. That’s one way to shit on WWE Studios. Ryback chops the shit out of Miz to get going, but Miz goes to Ryback’s bad leg to work it over. Ryback catches a big boot from Miz and takes over. Gorilla press into a powerslam. Meathook Clothesline! Miz tries to come back with a body block off the middle rope, but Ryback catches him and turns it into a vertical suplex before turning it into SHELL SHOCK and that ends this squash in 2:22.
Ryback then calls out Big Show. Show just walks off. Wait til Slam.
– Up next, the contract signing.
— Commercial Break —
Seth Rollins / John Cena Contract Signing
– The Authority in the ring for the Contract Signing. Seth Rollins is out next with a shirt that reads “Never Shuts Up” on the front and “You Can’t See Knee” on the back. Well if that’s his gimmick, he does it well… Seth sticks to his shirt, never shutting up, cutting a promo about all the greatness that will come out of Slam when he leaves with both titles. Seth talks about the fans witnessing something special this Sunday and how he looks forward to his statue being erected. Seth rips the Minnesota Twins for cheap heat before he tells Cena the times are changing and his time has passed him by. Rollins calls Cena the “villain” because he’s holding the fans hostage by controlling the main event for so long. The crowd is fairly anti-Cena so they’re into it. NOW we get to the broken nose part of the promo. He says the broken nose was the beginning of the process to free the WWE Universe of the disease known as John Cena. Cena is the disease, Rollins is the cure. lol… Seth calls Cena a coward for running to Tough Enough to answer the challenge with the “crippled” Daniel Bryan.
Cue John Cena… sporting a brand new orange shirt. He calls Seth a cheap imitation of John Cena with the mock shirt. All Cena has been thinking about is payback. Cena talks abou revenge, but breaking something of Seth’s is just an injury. But then it hit Cena, he is a 15 time Heavyweight Champion. And at Slam he will become 16 time champion. Poor Ric Flair. Cena says when Seth loses, HHH loses, because Cena will take the title and HHH’s mentor’s (Ric Flair) record. Cena says Seth isn’t the future, he’s a footnote, a trivia question. “Who did John Cena beat to win the WWE title for the 16th time”.
Cena says Seth is following in HHH’s footsteps. Ric Flair was HHH’s mentor, and now HHH is Seth’s mentor. The only difference is that HHH was never Flair’s bitch… oooohhh no he didn’t. lol… Cena then says he will also make Seth his bitch this Sunday…. Cena signs the contract and leaves…
HHH stares down Rollins with a concerned look. Rollins stares back.
Not one of Cena’s better go-home big match type promos, but it was decent near the end. To me this is one of those “feuds” that doesn’t hold a lot of storyline anticipation. This is more just show me what you got type anticipation. I’ll admit, I’m both worried and curious as to how this thing plays out. I think taking the belt off either guy right now is a bad move…
– Brock Lesnar on Sportscenter tomorrow morning at 9am and also on Mike & Mike.
— Commercial Break —
– Okay, so let’s see where we are right now… We’ve got about 50 minutes left in the show counting the run over. Twenty of that will likely go to the Brock/Taker stuff. So we’re looking at 30 minutes left in the program tonight and half of that will likely go to the Divas match. Assuming Dolph vs. Rusev is being added to the PPV there’s 10 matches now slated for Summer Slam. They’ve done the final sell for 6 of 10 matches. That leaves 4 matches to sell. We know the Divas and Taker/Brock have segments… That only leaves the Tag Title and the Amell match.
Speaking of the Tag Titles…
6. The Prime Time Players & Lucha Dragons vs. Los Matadores & New Day (w/Xavier)
New Day with a rhyming promo before the match. Matadores play heel, even knocking the faces off the apron. Cara lands a Angle Slam on one of the Matadores and hot tags to Titus who beats the crap of of the Matadores and throws them around. Woods distracts and the Matador lands a Back Stabber on O’Neil. Torito lands a flying butt press off the apron onto Woods on the floor. In the midst of this distraction, Kalisto comes in with a springboard huracan rana on the legal Matador for the pin in 2:10.
I know they don’t consider this match important, but this was just terrible for a final sell. New Day and Young never even tagged in.
– It’s confirmed, Rusev vs. Ziggler for Slam.
— Commercial Break —
– The next segment is dedicated to hyping Stardust & King Barrett vs. Stephen Amell & Neville. A video package airs hyping the match followed by a backstage promo from Stardust & Barrett. Barrett has to stand there and pretend like Cody is making sense. Barrett is handed a floating cape with chains and is now “The Cosmic King” Jesus Christ.
– Divas headed to the ring for action.
— Commercial Break —
7. NXT Women’s Champ Sasha Banks (w/Team BAD) vs. Divas Champ Nikki Bella (w/Brie & Fox)
Nikki controls early, Sasha finally comes back with the double stomp on the middle buckle, then mocks Nikki with pushups before break.
Back from break, Sasha still in control… Nikki MISSES A DISASTER KICK BY TWO FEET… THAT WAS TERRIBLE!!!!! Nikki comes back. Crowd doesn’t care. Alabama slam by Bella for 2. Sasha comes back with a variation of a neckbreaker for 2. “We Want Lesnar” chants begin as this drags on with a shitty Bella in the match. Nikki rolls through a reverse roll up and lands an Ocean Cyclone type suplex on Banks. Nikki goes for Rack Attack but Naomi distracts… Sasha with the Back Stabber and the Bank Statement. Nikki wants to fight it, but taps in 10:36.
– Backstage Renee Young with Paige, Charlotte and Becky. They’re going to win at Slam, with a little bit of Flair…. Wooo
– Brock is next.
— Commercial Break —
– We’re back with Paul Heyman who hyped of Brock lesnar’s credentials in the WWE, UFC, and NCAA… Brock is announced to the ring and the hometown crowd explodes…. Brock eats up the ovation. Paul gets down on his knees and worship Brock, and then sings Glory Glory Hallelujah with words changed to suit Brock Lesnar… Then a bell gongs and the lights flicker… Heyman gets scared for a moment but then he and Lesnar laugh it off… Heyman asks Taker if that’s the best he got, calls it Jedi mind tricks and calls Taker Obi Wan. lol…
Back to the promo, Heyman runs down Taker and what Brock has done to him. He points out Taker using the low blow at Battleground to drop Brock. Heyman continues to trash Taker until the lights go out with a GONG again… When they turn on it’s just Taker and Lesnar in the ring. aker immediately goes with a low blow again and connects. The crowd boos Taker as Lesnar is the hometown man. Taker plays it up heel style here, landing the low blow, then a chokeslam, and a Tombstone lays out Lesnar. Grandpa Eyeliner celebrates to a sea of boos to end the show. A bit of an odd and simple ending.
Nothing mind blowing for the go-home show. But with ten decent matches on one single card you don’t really need much to sell a 4 hour PPV for $9.99. They made a point to touch on all ten matches, so that was a plus.
