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Raw Pre-Show 7/14/14 from WWE Studios.
– First, just want to say sorry I missed last week, for those who paid attention at the end of the 6/30 Raw Report, I did note that I’d be missing the 7/7 Raw for vacation day reasons, but it turned out to be a trip to the hospital instead… Blah… Either way, everything’s good now, and I’m right back on track. It sucks to have missed my first Raw Report of the year last week, but I do feel refreshed so away we go…
– Love these budget cuts, no post show, and the preshow is once against live from the Studios, save those plane trips and production… It’s Byron Saxton hosting with Booker T and Alex Riley…
– There’s a DĂ©tente on Raw tonight with Swagger/Colter and Rusev/Lana… Want the definition? Google it… A debate if you will… No matter how you slice it, expect a match at Battleground.
– Back to last week’s Raw with the Rollins vs. Cena match and all the run-in crap that followed with Kane, Orton, Reigns, and then Ambrose preventing Rollins from crashing in again… I had intentions of doing a retro report of last week’s Raw, but something happened with the DVR and some of it didn’t record properly… I did catch this part of the show over the weekend, it is what it is…
– Fatal Four Way talk continues with clips from Smackdown, Reigns vs. Rusev with Orton getting involved. Battleground is this Sunday BTW, just in case you didn’t know, because I didn’t… lol
– Panel talks Rollins vs. Ambrose at Battleground. They spend 2 minutes on the match, how kind…
– Jericho vs. Wyatt talk for the PPV, or whatever they’re calling it this week… We see Orton beat Jericho last week after distraction from the Wyatts intro bumper. Jericho is scheduled to “call out” Bray Wyatt on Raw… Hope Chris brings Ric Flair as backup after MSG…
– They announce Ric Flair will return TONIGHT on Raw… I’ve read that he’s scheduled to kick off the final hour, but who knows…
– It’s more than evident this RAW preshow is nothing more than a way to hype Battleground, they talk the Battle Royal, several more names are added via pictures shown on the screen… Start filling in the jobbers now… I see Heath Slater, Titus O’Neil, the non-injured Matador, I may have missed others… Renee Young interviews super jobber RVD about the match, blah… Oh wait, Alberto Del Rio interrupts because guess what? ADR is going to win! RVD gets called a Perro, and I don’t mean Aguayo…
– And now we move on to Usos vs. Harper/Rowan for the PPV. Video plays from last week’s Raw, Wyatts win and will get a title rematch at Battleground, this time it’s 2 out of 3 falls… Booker calls Rowan/Harper thorns in the side of the Usos, like the Steiners and Nasty Boys were thorns in the sides of Harlem Heat…. there’s an analogy for you…
– It wouldn’t be a complete Battleground push without discussing AJ vs. Paige… Which is next… Last week it was AJ and Paige vs. Funkadactyls… The Funky-D’s split up, and AJ and Paige get along… For one week… Paige needs a heel turn badly, and it should be easy to do against the beloved AJ…. How many Divas angles are they cooking right now? Funky girls split, AJ/Paige, Fandango chicks, the Bella/Stephanie thing, hmph…
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WWE Raw 7/14/14 from the Richmond Coliseum in Richmond, VA
– Looks like we’re kicking this thing off with John Cena… ……… ….. I really don’t have anything to add. Crowd feels about the same as me… Cena starts hard selling the WWE Network Free Preview, because apparently you need to sign up RIGHT NOW to watch the PPV, which isn’t true… But if these guys want good paydays, they have to beg the fans to start signing up… Cena’s secure though… Blah Blah Blah, Cena talks about the Fatal Four Way, he slowly explains the rules and the participants.
Out comes Roman Reigns, who appears to be over with the fans. Cena reminds Reigns they have to make it to the PPV Sunday, so they must work together. Roman cuts him off because Cena won’t shut up. Reigns agrees they should get rid of Orton and Kane so it comes down to them two, so Reigns can see how good Cena really is.
Dean Ambrose appears on the Titan Tron to calm his two partners down for the 6-Man tonight. Kane, Seth Rollins, and Randy Orton attack Ambrose in the back, repeatedly ramming him into the garage door, while Cena and Reigns don’t do a damn thing… How’s that for some partners… Kane chokeslams Ambrose on a box, and Dean responds “Is that all you guys got?”… Nice….
Rollins then comes off the top of one box with a Curb Stomp on Ambrose into another box… Leaving him laid out…. Still no Cena or Reigns… What bitches!!! Ambrose needs to go rogue like Stone Cold and just kick all their asses…
-Commercial Break-
– Apparently Dean Ambrose has been sent to a medical facility… Maybe he will commandeer an Ambulance. đ
1. US Heavyweight Champion Sheamus vs. The Miz. Sheamus gets the corner square interview, apparently everyone is gunning for Miz’s face now, not that I can blame them… The Miz comes out and hypes the Network… Really? Really? Funny gimmick now, Miz’s face will be on the Titan Tron for the duration of the match… Sheamus dominates early on, fireman’s carry into a senton, and the Miz rolls outside for the commercial break.
Back from break, the match continues, Miz takes over, but they cut away to show a IC Title Battle Royal promo instead of the match… AWESOME! Sheamus fights back, the 10 beats of the bodhran or however you spell it, 2 count follows… Sheamus goes to the top rope, but gets pulled off and DDT’d, Miz gets a near fall… Miz tries his finisher, but Sheamus tosses him into the corner… Sheamus charges with the Brogue Kick, but misses, Miz with a roll up and likely hooked the tights for the win in 10:45….
– Backstage Orton & Kane mock Dean Ambrose’s beating from earlier… Kane and Orton argue over who will walk out WWE Champion, which makes no sense since just a few weeks ago Kane had no problem helping Orton in the MITB… Anyway, HHH shows up and tells the two they WILL work together at the PPV AND TONIGHT…
As Orton and Kane walk off, Stephanie McMahon shows up and professes her love to HHH… They kiss… Okay….
Dolph Ziggler on his way to the ring… They make sure NOT to announce his opponent, but it’s next…
-Commercial Break-
2. Dolph Ziggler vs. Fandango. It becomes painfully obvious after the break that Fandango is Dolph’s opponent. Ziggles misses a dropkick early and Fandango takes over. I can only assume the Divas will come out and dance and distract Fandango… And there it is… The ladies dance on the table, it distracts both wrestlers, but Fandango ends up taking the Famouser and Dolph gets the win in 3:00….
Summer Rae and Layla then kiss Dolph and leave with him after the match…
-Commercial Break-
– Damien Sandow is now a Sonic Carhop. Cue Adam Rose to step in and shill SONIC cheese dogs… Crappy “comedy” with the Rosebuds ensues and Sandow crashes on his roller skates, or blades, or whatever….
– The Usos are making their way out for a “match”, but they’re attacked in the airle by Harper & Rowan. One of the Usos gets a Harper Big Boot into the crowd, the other Uso takes a double chokeslam… Whole thing lasted a minute… Hope they get more time in the 2 out of 3 falls match…
-Commercial Break-
It’s the Rusev/Swagger DĂ©tente/Debate gimmick next…
Michael Cole is hosting this thing… Rusev and Lana are out first, Swagger is out next with Colter… Lana starts off with her usual US attack, I’ll give it to her, she managed to get “Shut Up” over…. She demands the US and the fans to apologize to Russia and to her… Colter finally hears enough, cuts a great promo about being in Vietnam and such, and he refuses to apologize….
Lana says Colter’s arrogance is the reason why the USA is crumbling… Lana says Vladimir Putin has the remedy to help the states… Colter talks about our leader, whether we like him or not, and real Americans respect the President… Colter says he’s done talking to Lana about Putin, he wants an answer from Rusev…. Colter asks Rusev to stop hiding behind Lana and accept Swagger’s challenge… Rusev responds “This Is War”…
Colter tells Lana to teach Rusev 3 words for Sunday… “WE THE PEOPLE”… Lana slaps Swagger, Rusev and Swagger tussle with Rusev getting the better… Rusev tries the big thrust kick, but Swagger catches and hooks on the Ankle Lock… Rusev manages to escape and hobbles outside to sell the move… Colter waves the American flag to end the fun segment… Decent stuff honestly…
– Backstage Cena confronts Roman Reigns about later, we learn that Ambrose is out and it’s not a handicap match…
-Commercial Break-
3. Rob Van Dam vs. Alberto Del Rio. So earlier ADR called RVD a dog… Now we wrestle… See how that works? Back and forth, RVD misses a plancha to the floor and ends up trapped between the ring and the apron skirt, Del Rio hits a enzuigiri while Rob is trapped… Good spot… ADR takes over, we end up in a chinlock, RVD comes back with the typical RVD stuff… RVD with the Frog Splash onto the knees of ADR… Del Rio hooks on the Cross Armbreaker and RVD taps quickly… Wow… 5:00 job by RVD…
– Promo for the CM Punk Story on the Network…
-Commercial Break-
– Nikki Bella enters the ring… Stephanie McMahon follows out to the stage… Let’s see what she has planned this time… Because Brie is gone, Nikki will have to fight a tag team match tonight, alone…
4. Nikki Bella vs. Alicia Fox & Cameron. Nikki does surprisingly well early on, but the heels come back and get them some… Nikki fires up and makes a big comeback against both, actually looks decent, but Fox hits some weird looking DDT thing with her legs to get the win for the heels in 3:30…
– Here it is… the STING TEASER is over… A video airs promoting STING in the WWE 2k15 Video Game…
-Commercial Break-
Apparently WWE Network has a 90% satisfaction rate……. MY ASS…
– Backstage, HHH tells Randy Orton not to worry about Kane, because Kane is just a pawn… but he’s their pawn… HHH says Orton is the plan, Randy says then there’s no need for a Plan B…
– It’s Goldust and Stardust, both acting completely stupid… Stardust blows stardust into Goldust’s face and laughs and laughs… Not really sure what the hell this was about…
– Cesaro makes his way out to the ring, and we learn that Paul Heyman has been fired…. More when we return…
-Commercial Break-
5. Big E vs. Cesaro. Big E is with Kofi Kingston, who beat Cesaro the last 2 weeks… The announcers speculate if Heyman was fired since he’s not with Cesaro… The fight goes to the floor and Cesaro hits Big E with a Hot Shot across the barricade and E falls into the crowd… Cesaro gets the heat on Big E, but E comes back with an over head belly to belly, and another belly to belly… Big Splash by E, and he drops the straps for the Big Ending, but Cesaro rolls outside… Cesaro grabs a chair to use on E, Kofi yanks the chair away, which distracts Cesaro, and Big E lands the Big Ending for the win in 3:30… Poor Cesaro…
– Chris Jericho on his way out to the ring to call out the Wyatts, NEXT… On Raw!
-Commercial Break-
– It’s Chris Jericho in the ring. He’s been here for 15 years and runs down all sorts of random WWE happenings throughout history, namedropping guys from the past and angles from the past, even noting his musical chairs championship… Chris has seen it all…. Til’ now… The Wyatt Family… They’re different, very different… Well Jericho says he is ready to get crazy too…
Bray Wyatt appears on the screen in the dark, funny how lighting and some makeup can cover a black eye… Bray says he has something for Jericho, he asks Chris if he’s afraid of the dark, and the lights go out… When they come back on, Rowan and Harper have Jericho cornered… Chris tries to fight them off, but that doesn’t last long… Chris escapes the ring before they can do anything much to him… Jericho backs up the aisle, and Bray Wyatt attacks from behind!!! And Sister Abigail on the stage!!!
Bray kneels over Jericho, there’s that black eye! Follow the buzzards….
-Commercial Break-
6. WWE Divas Champion AJ Lee vs. Eva Marie. Paige on commentary. CM Punk chants start the match, and OMG Eva Marie is working Raw… Paige explains what a “Frienemy” is… AJ with some cutesy spots to start, Marie takes over with a bow and arrow thingy and a backbreaker for 2… Eva shoots AJ into the corner and hooks her for another backbreaker, but AJ is guided SLOWLY into the Black Widow for the submission in 2:30…
AJ climbs over the announce table and takes JBL’s microphone. Paige sucks AJ’s ass and AJ goes along with it, then leaves… Very……odd… Hoping this just leads to Paige going full heel on Sunday…
– Backstage, Kane tells HHH and Stephanie that he doesn’t trust Randy… But if Kane is only in this to help Orton, why wouldn’t he trust him? Again, makes NO sense… HHH just tells Kane to do whatever he has to do Sunday to get it done… Whatever that means…
-Commercial Break-
Bo Dallas is out praying, thinking, or meditating… Bo can only hope his opponent tonight has a heart as large as El Torito… It’s Khali…
7. Bo Dallas vs. The Great Khali. Khali chops the crap out of Bo in the corner, Dallas chops back but Khali doesn’t sell it… Khali tosses Bo out of the ring and follows him out… Dallas goes to Khali’s knee, then hits the BO DOG off the apron to the floor… Khali winds up counted out in less than 2:00…
He’s 15 and BO!!!
Dallas admires the IC Title sitting at ringside and cuts a promo on Khali… Bo gets cut off with a KHALI CHOP out of nowhere… Funny stuff…
– Seth Rollins is with HHH and Stephanie… He’s concerned Kane and Orton won’t get the job done at the PPV… Rollins shows off his case, alluding to Plan B…
Paul Heyman then steps in and says if Plan A fails, and Plan B doesn’t work, then Heyman offers up a fool proof Plan C…
-Commercial Break-
– Renee Young stands in the ring to interview the Nature Boy, Ric Flair…. Flair has fun with the crowd and Renee before we get down to business… Renee asks Flair who he thinks will win the Fatal Four Way at the PPV… Really? You paid him to be here to get his opinion on the winner of a match? Anyway, Flair chooses Cena… Which must have pissed off Roman Reigns, because out he comes…
Reigns steps up to Flair, and Ric just kindly steps by and leaves to his music… WTF was that about???
Flair makes it to the top of the stage when John Cena makes his way out… Cena salutes Flair, hands him a title belt and runs to the ring… All of that build up for Flair and THAT was what we got???
Main event is next…
-Commercial Break-
8. John Cena & Roman Reigns vs. Kane, Randy Orton, and Seth Rollins. If you missed it earlier, Dean Ambrose was taken out of this match via backstage attack so it’s 2 vs. 3 now… Cena has the pleasure of trying all three heels on one at a time before Reigns tags himself in… Roman is right on Kane and keeps control until Rollins distracts and Kane hits a cheap shot for the heels to take over… Rollins tags in to put a beating on Reigns as we take the final break…
Back from break, Reigns escapes a Kane chinlock and both men go down… Hot tags to Rollins and Cena… Seth takes the usual Cena stuff, 5 knuckle shuffle, but escapes the AA. Kane distracts Cena and Rollins hits a pele kick and tags to Orton… Good old Orton, comes right in and hooks a chinlock… Cena makes it up, but Orton hits his modified backbreaker for 2…
Kane back in, Cena tries an AA but falls forwards because Kane weighs soooo much… Rollins in next, hooks Cena in a sleeper, then a superkick, then the triple vertical suplex, but Cena counters the third suplex and hot tags to Reigns… And Orton tags in as well… Reigns knocks Orton down with a punch and hits the dropkick on the apron… Reigns with the Superman punch to Kane, clotheslines Rollins out of the ring, Samoan Drop on Orton… Roman starts to spear Orton, but Kane attacks… Orton and Kane start double teaming Reigns and get DQ’s… Seriously? What is this, 1988? Would a pin have hurt anyone? Anyway, Cena and Reigns win by DQ in 15:00….
Kane accidentally hits Orton, or vise versa, I don’t even know… Rollins disappears while the other four title match guys brawl, Reigns accidentally spears John Cena… Reigns then gets laid out… Orton then RKO’s Kane….
Orton stands up on the middle rope before his music starts to play, and the crowd makes NO NOISE what so ever… If that tells you something…
Orton climbs back down and gets SPEARED by Roman Reigns… Reigns celebrates to end the show…
No Dean Ambrose at all? Wow… That’s kind of weird…. Whatever…. For $10 I won’t complain…
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