The WWE Raw Report 6/29/15 – Cena vs. Cesaro Steals The Show

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WWE Raw Preshow Notes For 6/29/15

– It’s Stanford, Otunga and Graves from WWE HQ. I really have come to hate this ensemble as a trio. You have Otunga forcefully trying to act heelish, Graves constantly tries to belittle Stanford, and Stanford is a deer in the headlights… Anywho, we learn that Cena is doing the U.S. Open Challenge tonight… maybe they’ll go back to having real matches instead of turning this into another angle segment with Owens… Also, it’s Rollins/Kane vs. Ambrose/Reigns in the main event tonight… It’s been announced on WWE.com that the match will be No DQ…

– The panel talks Rollins getting the Authority back together and taking out Brock Lesnar last week. They also touch on Rollins beating Ambrose 80 times over the last few weeks…

– Bray Wyatt plays borderline awesome heel/pedophile in his feud with Roman Reigns. I’ll give Bray one thing, he can get over some pretty lame songs when he sings them… This won’t end well for Wyatt’s push anyway…

– They talk to Dolph Ziggler via the phone about all of this Lana/Rusev crap… And now Summer Rae has been inserted as a potential interest for Rusev… I’ve never seen a feud kill everyone’s heat before…. But they’re trying with this one. Tonight “Dolph And Lana Go Public”, whatever the fuck that means…

– Ryback and Big Show beat up on each other last week. It was exciting as it sounds. The panel thinks the Miz is laying back and playing it smart, waiting for his opportunity.

– The panel talks who they think will accept Cena’s challenge tonight. Random names are dropped… They also show a brief clip of The Rock confronting Bo Dallas at a weekend Live Event in Boston… And that about does it.

The WWE Raw Report 6/29/15 from the Verizon Center in Washington D.C.

– We’ve got Seth Rollins, Kane, and J&J Security headed to the ring… Noble is selling his ribs but he’s out there.. Rollins talks about doing something that Reigns, Cena, and The Undertaker couldn’t do… He took a trip to Suplex City and burned it down… Rollins announces Brock Lesnar isn’t here and is boarding a plane to Japan right now…

Rollins wants to thank his cohorts, Kane, Mercury & Noble so he presents them all with Apple Watches… He then gives Kane a trip to Hawaii, complete with people in Hawaiian costumes to sell the trip…. This is terrible.

Next, Noble & Mercury are given a brand new Cadillac… As it is driven into the arena, Game Show music begins to play… Mercury oversells the car and jumps around with ridiculous facial mannerisms…. Shoot me now…

It’s like they’re PURPOSELY trying to have the worst segment ever… That was a good 17 minutes of my life I’ll never get back.

Big Show is wrestling Mark Henry next.

— Commercial Break —

1. The Big Show vs. Mark Henry

Miz on commentary. Henry dominates to begin and a Splash gets 2…. Big Show comes back with a KO punch and Henry staggers into the ropes, then bounces back into a SECOND KO Punch, and that ends it… Wow, who did Mark Henry piss off…. 1:22.

After the match, Ryback’s music hits and he and Big Show have a brawl in the ring… Miz enjoys watching them take each other apart… Ryback lays out Show with a tackle, and Miz plays the opportunist and sneaks into the ring to drop Ryback with a running boot… Miz runs off leaving Ryback pissed…

— Commercial Break —

2. IC Champ Ryback vs. The Miz

Lots of Ryback on top to start… Ryback with possibly the longest delayed vertical suplex in history but few of the “WWE Universe” appreciates the spot… I think Ryback tries to give Miz a wedgie but is pulled back by the ref and Miz goes low with a kick and lands a DDT for 2… Miz takes over for a bit, then Ryback turns things around and looks for the Meathook, but Miz bails and takes a Count Out loss. Ryback wins in 5:00.

This is bad.

— Commercial Break —

Could they possibly follow the last 40 minutes with another crap segment? Oh, never mind….

3. Paige vs. Alicia Fox (w/The Bellas)

If you haven’t been paying attention, Fox has joined “Team Bella”. The announcers have to get over that Nikki Bella is the SECOND longest Divas Champion… AJ watch out… Another 75 days or so and Nikki has the record. Paige dominates the majority of the match. Paige follows Fox out to the floor and finds herself surrounded but the Bellas and Alicia, Paige loses that situation and Fox takes over as we head to break…

Back from break, Fox has control. Alicia with a few near falls and questions the ref’s count. A frustrated Fox goes to the chinlock, Paige escapes and comes back with a series of nasty knee strikes and kicks and whatnot. Paige gets distracted by Nikki Bella, allowing Fox to execute the roll up, but Paige reverses the rolling cradle and picks up the win in 9:35.

This wasn’t good, neither girl really even broke out their “good stuff” in the ring here. HOWEVER, this was easily as good as most of the men’s Raw matches that are boring. So it wasn’t any worse than Sheamus vs. Anyone, for instance…

– John Cena quickly headed to the ring for the Open Challenge… Leave the ring ladies…

— Commercial Break —

– So it’s U.S. Open Challenge Time… Maybe we’ll actually get a match this week instead of another angle… Cena isn’t even going to cvut a promo, BUT Kevin Owens comes out… The announcers sell it like Owens is accepting the challenge, Lilian even starts introducing Owen as the challenger, but NOBODY is buying it.

After introductions, Owens gets on the mic and says he has decided to wait for Battleground. Instead, Owens introduces CESARO for Cena’s challenger. Owens joins for commentary, ugh.

4. U.S. Champion John Cena vs. Cesaro

Some back and forth between the two to start, and it ends with Cena trying to be cute with a monkey flip spot. Cesaro catches Cena in mid air of a leap frog and turns it into a powerslam, Rick Steiner style. Cesaro leaves Cena hanging and finally tosses him in a gut wrench suplex for 2. Big boot gets Cesaro another 2. Cena tries to create separation with an awkward looking standing dropkick, but I’ll give him credit for trying… Cesaro takes right back over however. Middle rope elbow gets Cesaro yet another near fall as we head to commercial…

Back from break, and we apparently missed some good shit during the break… Figures. Cesaro now looks for the Sharpshooter but Cena escapes and comes back with his five knuckle shuffle shit, but Cesaro clotheslines his face off for 2. It’s a little back and forth, Cesaro catapults Cena into the ropes, but John lands on the middle rope and springs backwards into the Stunner for a near fall… Cute spot, but Cena just looks awkward doing these things. Cena for the AA, Cesaro lands on his FEET! Cesaro throws Cena TEN FEET into the air and catches him with a EUROPEAN UPPERCUT!!!! 1……….2………..Cena kicks out…. Cena trips Cesaro down and locks in the STF.

Cesaro POWERS FREE and turns the STF over into the SHARSHOOTER in the middle of the ring!!! Cena gets to the ropes for the break. Cena rolls to the apron, Cesaro SUPERPLEXES Cena back in from the apron!!! 1…………2…………… Cena kicks out again! Running uppercut on Cena in the corner, Cena blocks a second one and lands a TORNADO DDT for a near fall on Cesaro. The two trade punches, Cesaro to the apron, goes up top for a body block, but Cena rolls through and holds on and lands some sort of weird swinging face buster for a near fall. Now Kevin Owens leaves commentary to walk over and warn Michael Cole about his comments, and it distracts Cena as he is climbing the ropes. This allows Cesaro to uppercut Cena off the top rope to the floor…

Cesaro lands a running Uppercut to Cena against the barricade and back inside it gets a 2 count. Cesaro tries the NEUTRALIZER, but Cena backdros his way free and hits the Amazing Red Bomb thingy for a near fall… Cena tries the AA, Cesaro counters… NEUTRALIZER CONNECTS!!!!!!! 1…………..2……………………Cena kicks out!!!!

Cesaro goes Uppercut Crazy and then CESARO SWING!!!!!!! AND THE SHARPSHOOTER!!!!!! WILL CENA TAP??????????????

KEVIN OWENS ATTACKS CESARO!!!!!! OWENS CAUSES A DQ at 20:11…. GARBAGE….

Owens lays out Cesaro with the POP UP POWERBOMB…. Then a Pop Up Powerbomb to Cena as well…

Owens proclaims nobody is going to take the U.S. Title from Cena except him…

A classic match wasted with a bullshit finish. Which I wouldn’t mind if they had intentions to follow up on this match. But they won’t. Amazing stuff here. Completely salvaged the show after the first hour completely stunk.

— Commercial Break —

– The announcers talk the Rollins/Lesnar feud when they’re interrupted by…

BRAY WYATT Promo

On the screen as usual. Wyatt produces a picture of Roman Reigns with the eyes cut out. The picture reads “Anyone But You” mocking the fans statement that anyone but Reigns should get the push. Bray says is the the yin to Reigns yang and he won’t let Reigns succeed. Anyone but you Roman…. Anyone… Run!

– Lucha Dragons headed to the ring for an 8-man tag.

— Commercial Break —

– We’re reminded Rock made a surprise appearance at the Boston live event over the weekend… But he’s not here in D.C., so let’s remind the fans…

5. Lucha Dragons & Prime Time Players vs. The New Day (All 3) and Bo Dallas

Bo should have joined New Day long ago. They all send the same message, when they’re allowed on the mic… NEW DAY HAVE SHIRTS!!! Go buy’em and support the NEWWW DAYYYY. I don’t think new Day have been able to cut a promo since their title loss… Sad. Kalisto gets jiggy with flippies early on. Lucha Dragons both with some nice fast paced stuff until Xavier cuts Cara off. Bo Dallas tags in but immediately gets taken down and screams in pain. PTP beat down on Bo, Titus with the throw away slam. Bo finally manages to take over on Kalisto, and then works over Darren Young. New Day isn’t doing shit. Darren Yougn with a BACK SUPLEX ON THE APRON!!! Things break down with all 8 men arguing on the floor as we take a break…

Back from break, Woods has Kalisto down. Big E takes over with an over head belly to belly but Kalisto flips through the move and makes the hot tag to Cara. Cara with Lucha-y stuff on Big E and lands a top rope somersault body block for 2… Darren Young tags in and lands his THIRD butt drop of the match… Ok. Young looks for his finisher but Big E escapes. The crowd is DEAD for Young. DEAD. Young takes a bump the floor from Big E and Bo Dallas lays him out with a clothesline outside and gets a 2 count. New Day take over and wear down Young in their corner. Crowds dead, nobody cares about Young at all. Bo and Young crack heads and Darren finally makes a hot tag to Titus.

O’Neil plows over Dallas and Kofi. Big Boot kills Kofi. Titus with the old school POUNCE, sort of, gets 2. Now everyone is in the ring, and Darren and Bo bump to the floor. Titus does the Lucha dance, then the Lucha Dragons do dives to Big E & Xavier. Kofi and Titus continue the fight inside. Kignston off the top but dives right into a sit out Spinebuster from Titus for the win in 14:30.

Dolph and Lana “go public”, next.

— Commercial Break —

Dolph Ziggler & Lana / Rusev & Summer Rae Segment

– Okay, so Lana and Ziggz are headed out to “go public”. Whatever that means. We’re reminded of how stupid Rusev looked last week. What a tough bad ass evil foreign villain, throwing crutches and falling down because he’s heartbroken. Ziggler says it’s confession time. Dolph says this all started out with Lana trying to get back at Rusev, but it’s turned into much more.

Lana says for years Rusev was her life and she didn’t know what a real man was. He told her how to talk and dress, but she’s her own person now. Dolph treats her with respect, and oh my God I can’t believe I’m typing this crap…. Lana says her and Dolph have become more than just friends.

Here comes Rusev out on a crutch, under the wrong arm… WITH Summer Rae…. And Lana looks PISSSSED. Rusev hops up the steps as I come to realize this has become a full fledged episode of General Hospital. Rusev says he never cared for Lana, and kissing her was like kissing a ring post or a cold fish.

Ziggler cuts him off and refers to Lana as his girlfriend, and tells Rusev to walk away before Ziggz does something to his other leg. Rusev hands the crutch to Summer and confronts Zigglesworth… WHY AM I TYPING THIS MUCH ABOUT CRAP LIKE THIS??? USA chants???? Ok…. Rusev backs off and leaves, but Summer has something to say…. Oh boy.

Summer hates a gold digger like Lana. She left Rusev after his loss at Mania and his injury. Rae says Lana is a two faced phony. Summer slaps the shit out of Lana. LANA TACKLES Summer Rae and pounds on her… Ziggler pulls her off, and she attacks Summer again!! Rae crawls off with Rusev and Lana looks all angry hot. End segment… BLAH

Backstage, Dean Ambrose is talking to Terminator props… Roman Reigns interrupts and asks Dean if he’s ready for tonight. Ambrose talks about Wyatt upsetting Reigns and he’s glad because he likes the angry Roman Reigns. Reigns is pumped that it’s No DQ. He’s ready to RAGE. He calls Ambrose his only family in WWE. Reigns cuts a terrible goofy “angry” promo and walks of. Dean is psyched that Reigns is angry. Could Reigns have cut a faker promo?

— Commercial Break —

6. Neville vs. Sheamus

I had forgotten Sheamus won MITB, that’s pretty sad. Crowd is DEAD for Sheamus, per the usual. Hey, WWE, HE’S NOT OVER… He COULD be over in the right situation, but the crap you’re doing with him isn’t working… Sheamus dominates to start, Neville comes back with the double flippy across the ring and a big boot. Neville lands a flying rana, tries for a second one but Sheamus holds him in the air. The two men stumble towards the ropes and Neville ranas Sheamus over the top to the floor… Neville sets up for a running dive to the floor but Sheamus runs away, and we go to break.

Back from break, Neville is on the apron but springboards back inside into a rolling senton. Sheamus with a vertical suplex into a throw, and then adjusts his mohawk. BORING chants…. I can’t agree more. Sheamus beats on Neville but Neville Superkicks the shit out of Sheamus’ face… NICE… A trio of Irish Curse backbreakers follows as Sheamus remains in control. Neville fights back and eventually sends Sheamus to the floor… TOP ROPE SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT to the floor onto Sheamus!!!

Back inside, Neville with a missile dropkick off the top to the back of Sheamus for a near fall… Sheamus tries his powerslam, Neville escapes and Shamus runs into the post in the corner… Neville lays him out with the enzuigiri and goes up for the RED ARROW, but Sheamus knocks Neville off the top rope… This leads to the BROGUE KICK that ends it in 12:45.

— Commercial Break —

7. King Barrett vs. Jack Swagger

Swagger is relegated to “already in the ring” jobber status. Poor Swaggz. It’s all Swagger to start, he hooks the ankle lock but Barrett crawls out of the ring. Swagger whips Wade into tbe barricade. Back inside, Wade catches Jack with a couple shots in the corner and the Bull Hammer ends it that quickly. Crowd could care less, complete silence… Didn’t we just see this squash a week or two ago? Time was 1:46.

Main Event is next.

— Commercial Break —

NO DISQUALIFICATION
8. Roman Reigns & Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins & Kane

J&J Security accompany Seth and Kane via their new Cadillac, which they apparently share. This is No DQ, and there’s quite a bit of time left. The faces want to start off hot, but the heels take over after a few moments. Reigns is beat down in the ring by Kane, Rollins has Ambrose laid out on the floor as they take a break only a couple minutes into the match.

Back from break, Reigns is being worked over. Roman drops Kane and hot tags to Dean while Seth also tags in. Ambrose is a house-o-fire… Ambrose goes bat shit crazy and he and Reigns do some ass kicking… Dean tosses Mercury into the time keepers area, drops Rollins, and yanks a TABLE out from under the ring… But Seth attacks Ambrose and lays him out. Then Reigns powerbombs Rollins… Merucy whacks Reigns with a kendo stick but ROMAN NO SELLS and beats Merucry down with the cane… He beats KANE with the CANE… And BREAKS THE CANE OVER MERCURY…. Noble just stands outside with his ribs…

SUPERMAN PUNCH TO KANE!!! SUPERMAN PUNCH TO MERCURY!!!! SUPERMAN PUNCH TO ROLLINS!!!!!!!!

THE LUGHTS GO OUT….

BRAY WYATT ATTACKS ROMAN REIGNS!!!!

Wyatt sends Reigns into the steps and beats him dow. Urinage onto the announce table!

It’s down to Ambrose vs. everyone…. for now…. Ambrose goes nuts on Kane, but he can’t handle both men… Dean looks for Dirty Deeds, but Seth breaks it up. Kane with a chokeslam on Dean, and then Seth with the PEDIGREE ends the match in 12:00…. The match ends at 11 sharp… Leaving time for something…

After the match, they set Dean up for a Triple Powerbomb, but Reigns makes the save and beats down Seth, Kane and J&J… But the numbers take over again and Reigns eats a Kane Chokeslam.

But Superman Reigns COMES BACK AGAIN… And ALL FOUR HEELS RUN OFF… SERIOUSLY???? WTF

All the heels surround the ring and attack Reigns from all 4 sides, taking him down. But apparently Reigns is tougher than Brock Lesnar, because he KEEPS COMING BACK…. Finally another chokeslam drops him… I have no idea where Ambrose went.

Seth with a RUNNING POWERBOMB THROUGH THE TABLE IN THE CORNER on Reigns…. But they outlawed the Curb Stomp. That makes sense…

Reigns comes crawling out…. And eats a Pedigree.

Bray Wyatt returns to the ring afterwards…. SISTER ABIGAIL…

Jesus, why doesn’t everyone come out and do their finisher…

End Show.

Watch the Cena vs. Cesaro segment for sure…. and NOTHING else.

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