The WWE Raw Report 5/4/15

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No preshow news this week peoples, but it’s time for Raw!

WWE Raw Repport 5/4/15 from the Bell Centre in Montreal, Quebec, Canada

– Raw kicks off with Randy Orton heading to the ring for promo time. Orton talks about the PPV PAYBACK being aptly named. The fans picked Rollins to defend against Orton AND Roman Reigns in a Triple Threat at Payback. Orton is going to win the title and get his PAYBACK.

Cue Roman Reigns. He says Orton is wrong, Roman will get his PAYBACK on Seth. Wow they’re beating this PPV name to death quickly… Crowd hates Roman, screaming RKO chants and booing the hell out of everything he’s saying. Orton rebuts with his credentials, 12 times World champion, 12 straight WrestleManias. Reigns replies and says he beat Orton at Summerslam. I’m glad somebody remembers that…. Reigns says he’s fine with breaking Orton in half again…

NEW DAYYYY music hits… No I'[m not kidding… Rather than looking surprised, Orton starts bobbing his head to their theme, lol…. Xavier Woods on the mic, New Day hates all this negativity. It’s a NEW DAY people…. NEW DAY SUCKS chants. Kofi and Big E take their turns on the mic. Big E makes some bad jokes. Big E invites Orton & Reigns to clap with him… New Day announces they’ll be facing Orton and Reigns tonight in a handicap match, per the instructions of Corporate Kane. That match is next…

— Commercial Break —

HANDICAP MATCH
1. Randy Orton & Roman Reigns vs. WWE Tag Champions New Day (Xavier Woods, Kofi Kingston, Big E)

Booker seems to think the titles are on the line under “Freebirds Rules”…. First off, the titles are NOT on the line. Second, Freebirds Rules mean any 2 of the 3 are defending, not all 3. Orton & Reigns control the early minutes, getting along, working as a team as they work over Xavier “P.S.” Hayes. Big “Bamm Bamm” Gord-E (see what I did there?) makes a blind tag and drops Orton with a belly to belly. Tag to Kofi Jack Roberts and all three New Day-Birds take over on Randy. New Day controls as we head to break.

WWE App action – Big E misses the big splash on Randy. And then E misses a shoulder in the corner. Orton hot tags to Reigns, but Big E nails Reigns before eh can even get in the ring… Roman shakes it off however and dominates all three New Day. Roman becomes distracted with Kofi & Xavier and Big E knocks Reigns off the apron to the floor. Big E drives Reigns into the barricade and the ring apron and New Day takes back over in their corner.

Back from break, New Day with lots of fast tags and big moves score several near falls on Roman. Finally Xavier with the cinlock of excitement, Roman escapes and hot tag to Randy. Orton clears the ring of all 3 New Day. Suspension DDT on Kofi. Orton sets Kingston up for the RKO, but Woods out of nowhere jumps into an RKO outta nowhere.

Orton looking for RKO on Kofi again, but Reigns charges with a spear, Kofi moves, and REIGNS SPEARS ORTON… Big E yanks Reigns out of the ring while Kingston covers Orton for the WIN… The WIN. In 13:13. NEW DAYYYYYYYYYYYYY

– Corporate Kane comes out after the match. He wants to exploit Orton & Reigns’ hate with each other, so in tonight’s main event the two men will face each other… Just what everyone wants, to see the same guys fight again.

– Kane leaves the stage and returns to the back. He passes New Day who are celebrating. Kane then runs into Seth Rollins. Seth says Kane has been screwing up for weeks, and now he’s trying to make right tonight to get on the good side of HHH & Stephanie when they return. Kane books Seth Rollins vs. Dean Ambrose with J&J Security banned from ringside… Rollins says Ambrose knows he can’t beat him and will just try to hurt him. Seth bitches at Kane until Kane threatens to make the match worse. Seth storms off pissed.

— Commercial Break —

– WWE App interview with King Barrett. Crown, cape, scepter, and all.

– Ryback heading to the ring for a promo with Renee Young. We’re reminded of Bray Wyatt’s attack from last week. Montreal fans gate Ryback, lots of Goldberg chants. Wow these people live 15 years ago, come up with something new… Ryback acknowledges it and somehow it turns into “FEED ME MORE” chants. Ryback doesn’t know why Bray did what he did. Ryback eats fear. He eats negativity. Ryback is giving a baby face promo, talking about helping kids, he has to scream the promo over the Montreal marks, yet they chant right along with “Feed Me More”. Ryback says Bray has his attention now. Talking time is done, it’s feeding time.

Cue the Bray Wyatt promo from the big screen… Some of the usual stuff, he tells Ryback to RUN.

— Commercial Break —

– WWE App interview with Heath Slater. He plans to accept the US Championship Open invitation again tonight for a third time. Joy.

2. Cesaro & Tyson Kidd (w/Natalya) vs. The Ascension

Whoa, Ascension makes it on Raw this week. Usually they’re jobbing on Superstars. Crowd makes ZERO noise for them. Insert Promo by the Ascension, they’re the tag team of the future. Booker & JBL have fun with that comment. Ascension attacks to start and take control on Tyson. Eventual hot tag to Cesaro, European uppercuts-o-plenty the crowd chants along as Cesaro lands 10 of them, and a clothesline gets 2… Cesaro calls for the SWING, Konnor distracts and Viktor lays out Cesaro. Tyson with a somersault dive out onto Konnor. Cesaro hooks Viktor in the GIANT SWING, right into a dropkick from Kidd and this one is over in 4:03. Somehow that’s the finisher now.

– Backstage Renee Young interviews Seth Rollins about his match tonight. I guess Seth didn’t say enough earlier… Rollins says the match is pointless and Kane is a moron.

— Commercial Break —

3. Dean Ambrose vs. Seth Rollins

With J&J Security already barred from ringside, Corporate Kane steps out to make another announcement. Since Seth says there’s no point to this match, Kane will rectify the situation. If Ambrose wins the match tonight, Dean will join the main event at Payback!!! Seth bitches about it, but Dean loves it. Rollins doesn’t care what the fans think, and “Canada doesn’t matter”. Kane says the match is on and we get going.

Ambrose goes right after Seth with some quick pin attempts. Dean has control for a couple of minutes before Seth takes over. Seth with a little basic offense before Ambrose returns with a whip on Seth, sending Rollins into the corner with the Shawn Michaels flip. Dean had control for a but before it’s Seth turn again. Rollins with the chinlock of excitement, Dean eventually escapes and backdrops Seth outside. It must be commercial time… Yup…

WWE App action continues… It’s back and forth in the ring and out on the floor. Rollins lands a nice dropkick for 2 and maintains control from there.

Back from break, Seth has the old Big Daddy Cool neck vice applied on Dean. Ambrose escapes but Seth drives him into the middle buckle with a Downward Spiral. Seth tries a move off the top, but Dean comes back with a Tornado DDT. Dean starts landing some of his token offense from there, the bulldog in the ring, the suicide dive to the floor on Seth. Inverted Sit out Powerbomb gets a near fall on Seth!!! Crowd chanting this is awesome…

Some counters by both, Seth misses a corner splash, Dean with the top rope flying elbow attack gets 1……….2……….Rollins kicks out. Seth comes back, drops Dean’;s throat on the ropes, lands a enzuigiri kick from the apron and completely MISSES a springboard knee by like TWO FEET, but Ambrose sells it anyway… lol… Wow, that was bad… 2 count. Seth smacks around Ambrose, Dean tries to fight back, Seth superkicks him for a near fall…

Ambrose escapes the Powerbomb in the corner and the 2 trade shots. Ambrose with a Cactus clothesline and they both spill to the floor. More fun counters by both on the floor leads to Seth landing a RUNNING POWERBOMB INTO THE BARRICADE ON THE FLOOR!!!! Referee reaches 9, and AMBROSE BEATS THE COUNT!!!!

More fun counters from both, TORNADO ENZUIGIRI by Seth. DAMN!… Ambrose bounces right back with the CLOTHESLINE OF DEATH!!!! Both men are dead and down… Awesome… J&J SECURITY RUNS IN TO PREVENT DIRTY DEEDS… Ambrose disposes of them… Seth sneaks up behind Ambrose, but Dean switches and rolls him up…1………………….2………………..3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 3!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DEAN AMBROSE WINS AN AWESOME MATCH IN 16:32…. AMBROSE IS GOING TO PAYBACK… Greatest News Ever!!!

— Commercial Break —

– As I had time to get over the excitement… I came to realize when Dean was added to the match… Somebody has to job… Sigh. Even still, the match is more interesting now.

– Backstage Kane is dealing with an angry Seth Rollins. Kane threatens to add more people to the match. Kane says overcoming adversity will help Seth become the man he needs to be. Kane tells Seth that he has a plan.

– Byron Saxton with Lana. He mentions the fans recent cheers for her. She seems like she enjoys it but downplays it. Fandango comes into the screen and tells her to embrace the fans like he has. Then Macho Man Rusev Savage comes in and yells at Lana in Russian for being a fan favorite female. Back to the locked closet Lana!

— Commercial Break —

4. Rusev (w/Lana) vs. Fandango

Lana comes out to a delay behind Rusev and the fans pop when she does. Lana walks 20 feet behind Rusev to the ring. Not really liking what they’re doing with her at all, bit Vince wants her as a face so there’s no stopping the boss. Rusev domiantes until he misses a splash in the corner. Fandango rolls to the floor and convinces Lana to dance with him… Really? Her character just changes like that? Rusev gets pissed and plows Fandango over on the floor and sends Lana to the dressing room… The distraction allows Fandango to take over on offense for a bit, but Rusev eventually kicks his face off… Accolade, and it’s over in 2:13.

This entire Lana/Rusev story makes NO SENSE… Lana controlled things, she was about Russia, she was about dominating… Now all of a sudden she likes dancing and being cheered, oh yeah and somehow Rusev controls things now… Makes no sense and it’s rushed. Vince wants to turn her face fast and drop her fake accent… Take everything away from her… brilliance…

— Commercial Break —

– Backstage on the WWE App, Adam Rose is overseeing a photo shoot with Rosa Mendes… Ok…

– Advertising for tomorrow’s big ESPN piece on WWE… Should be pretty awesome based on what ESPN has said.

– More idiots making fools of themselves for Tough Enough.

5. Stardust vs. R-Truth

Cody has some type of shiny bag with him. Insert Promo from Cody, R-Truh stole his chance at the King of the Ring. This Stardust thing needs to go. Usually after a while things either grow on me or I can tune them out, but this gimmick continues to irritate. Cody places the bag in the corner and the announcers talk about Jake the Snake. Cody controls for the most part, Truth comes back but goes to look into the mysterious bag and Stardust takes back over. BLOWN SPOT, looks like Truth was going for his forearm and Cody tries a cross body. Truth comes back with a sit out gourd buster for 2… Truth goes for the bag… A bunch of TOY SPIDERS fall out… Truth gets scared, and Cody rolls him up for the win… THAT WAS NOT ONLY BAD… IT WAS EMBARRASSING…. The crowd doesn’t make a single noise… Cody wins in 2:55.

— Commercial Break —

– Fatal Four Way Contract Signing for Payback will be on Smackdown.

– John Cena Suuuucks singing continues well after his music, lol… Ole chants begin as the fans attempt promo sabotage on Cena. Cena has to change up his promo to acknowledge the super heat he’s getting. He tries to tie in what the fans are doing with his upcoming match with Rusev, but the fans don’t care and keep chanting Ole, lol…. Cena continues to try and finish his promo, but it’s worthless at this point. The crowd stops him every 10 seconds. Cena tries to sell the I QUIT match with Rusev big time. He talks about fighting for what you believe in. He wins some of the crowd, but mainly because he’s acknowledging them and picking out specific fans. Gotta give him credit, he’s doing everything he can to work through this crowd.

The open challenge starts NOW… Who will it be??? IT’S BRET HART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BRET HART!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BRET HART IN THE BUILDING…..

Bret enters the ring… He’s here to introduce a great wrestler…. but he’s cut off by….

HEATH SLATER…. With 3MB music… Heath cuts a promo as he walks to the ring. Slater says he’s getting sick of getting attacked out of nowhere, he walks right into a punch from Bret… LMAO… Heath bumps to the floor…

BRET HART INTRODUCES MONTREAL’S OWN…. NXT STAR…. SAMI ZAYN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Crowd goes ridiculously nuts… This should be good… It starts after the break.

— Commercial Break —

– WWE App – We get the introductions of the match.

6. U.S. Champion John Cena vs. Sami Zayn

Match starts on the App but I’ll cover it here. “Let’s Go Sami” chants are deafening. They stall for as long as they can until USA returns. Cena with a shoulder tackle as we head back to USA. Cena throws Zayn in the air, but Sami hits a dropkick. Cena dodges an attempted dive and Sami does a little flipping and showboating to save himself. Cena retaliates with some lame looking back suplexes get a 2 count. Zayn goes down, selling his shoulder, and the referee calls for the big X…. The doctor rushes to the ring to check on Zayn. Sami opts to continue the match… That will be his out to save face.,

Cena takes over with all his usual stuff, Zayn counters the 5 knuckle shuffle with a victory roll up for a near fall… Zayn takes over and Cena rolls to the floor to recover. Zayn lands a somersault dive to the floor over the top rope and lands on Cena. Back inside, Cena hooks the STF but the fans get behind Zayn and he makes it to the ropes. Zayn with a Downard Spiral out of nowhere and right into the KOJI CLUTCH!!!! Cena doesn’t know what to do, he looks confused and scared lol, good facials… Cena powers his way up to his feet, but Zayn hooks a roll up for 2… Rusev & Lana are shown looking on backstage.

Zayn rushes at Cena but John lands a clothesline. Sami escapes an AA but lands on his ass… Both men clothesline each other… Truth be told, this match has been all kinds of sloppy. With Cena outside, Sami runs around ringside, dives over the bottom rope on one side and pops out the other side with the Tornado DDT… Cena rolled back inside, but Zayn runs into the AA…. 1……….2………… ZAYN KICKS OUT OF THE AA… HOLY WOW….

Zayn witha backwards leapfrog, lands behind Cena… Spinning BLUE THUNDER BOMB!!!!! 1…………2…………….Cena kicks out!!!

Now Zayn is selling that shoulder big time. Cena fights back, hits that crappy looking Springboard Stunner… AA again, and it’s over in 11:46.

The match was sloppy at times in the first half, but it was perfectly fine in general. For Zayn’s first WWE match against someone the likes of Cena, the guy did just fine…

Cena sells the match as hard fought and applauds Zayn after the match.

– Did you know the Network is FREE… AGAIN… Ugh.

– Michael Cole reminds us Reigns vs. Orton tonight. I had forgotten… Sigh.

– The Bellas walk past New Day, who are still celebrating their win… lol

— Commercial Break —

– Renee Young looking for Sami Zayn, but New Day shows up instead. They’re still celebrating. They’re VICTORIOUS!!! Cesaro & Tyson interrupt. It’s a back and forth of nothingness that leads to a New Day Sucks chant.

7. Divas Champion Nikki Bella (w/Brie) vs. ??

Match doesn’t happen, the Bellas don’t make it to the ring before Naomi and TAMINA lay them out hardcore… Naomi holds Nikki while Tamina superkicks her face off. Then Tamina holds Brie while naomi kicks her face off… Crowd boos. Taminas back with a Divas version of Sheamus’ stupid haircut.

Naomi informs the Bellas that their days of dominance is over and “this is what family is all about”, referencing her marriage to Jimmy Uso, and Tamina being related.

– Now KING BARRETT comes to the ring. Wow they’re squeezing a lot into 5 minutes. lol. He plays up being King on the mic. He says we will be hearing All Hail King Barrett” a lot now. How creative.

— Commercial Break —

7. Dolph Ziggler & Neville vs. Sheamus & King Barrett

Barrett & Ziggler start, Barrett takes control for a bit. Ziggler comes back and lands a spike DDT… Sheamus tags in but stalls with Dolph. We go to break.

Ziggler looks good on the WWE App, but the heels take over during the break.

Back from break, Sheamus lands an Irish Curse backbreaker on Ziggler. Sheamus slaps Ziggler around until Dolph lands a SUPERKICK. Hot tag to Neville & Barrett. Neville dives outside onto Wade, and a Sprinboard dropkick. Standing shooting star gets 2…. Wafde comes back, sets up for a Bull Hammer, but Neville ducks and hits an enzuigiri and a German Suplex gets 2…

Sheamus comes in, but Ziggler takes him to the floor… Sheamus dumps Ziggler upside down into the time keeprs area… Inside the ring, Neville lays out Barrett and climbs outside to go for Red Arrow, but Sheamus dumps him on the apron. Neville kicks Sheamus away and goes up top but jumps right into a BULL HAMMER… King Barrett gets the win in around 10:00….

Main event is next. They’re rushing these guys to the ring and the last match barely had time to get out of the ring.

— Commercial Break —

As the clock strikes 11 we return, and out comes KANE, Rollins and J&J… Noble says he is special ring announcer. Mercury is “bell keeper”, lol… Kane is special enforcer. Rollins is specialcommentator…

8. Randy Orton vs. Roman Reigns

Orton tries an RKO right out of the gate. Back and forth and it spilles to the floor… Kane & J&J try creeping up on them but the fight goes back inside. Reigns takes over briefly, then Orton comes back with his backbreaker. It’;s back and forth, one guys signature move, then the other. Orton with the powerslam. Superman Punch from Reigns. Orton ends up on the floor and Kane and J&J beat down Randy… Reigns dives out onto Kane & J&J, but Rollins sneaks up and posts Roman. Now all the heels beat down Reigns and Orton… Match is over after 6:00…

DEAN AMBROSE HITS THE RING…. The faces clear the ring… Reigns lands a spear….

The three faces stand tall… RKO ON ROMAN REIGNS!!!!

Randy celebrates, but turns into DIRTY DEEDS ON ORTON!!!!

Ambrose celebrates to end the show!!!

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