WWE Raw Preshow Notes 3/23/15
– It’s the GO-HOME SHOW TO WRESTLEMANIA!!! We’ve got Graves, Otunga, and Stanford hyping tonight’s show while pimping Mania. Corey Graves is wearing some form of shiny black pants and a tight electric blue suit coat… I don’t think that looks for ANYONE… Anyway, the first feud we look at is Orton vs. Rollins. Rollins tries to play Orton last week on Raw as the Authority pretend to turn on Seth only to TRICK Orton. That creepy ass Authority!!! Seth and the Authority look to have Orton surrounded when STING SHOWS UP and helps Randy clear the ring. So I guess we kinda take a look at the Sting/HHH feud at the same time…
– Sting KICKS OFF tonight’s Raw with an in ring interview… Otunga talks about the great shape HHH is in, but questions Sting’s condition since he’s always wearing t-shirts… Ouch.
– Renee Young is with the Bellas at Raw. The Bellas aren’t worried about team “stale and pale”. The Bellas are going to give Divas a chance tonight on Raw, so tonight Nikki will defend her title tonight against either AJ Lee or Paige tonight… The catch? AJ Lee and Paige have to make a decision among themselves as to who gets the title show… Well, that’s actually a pretty damn good story point. I’m almost impressed…
– They talk Reigns vs. Lesnar and the two meeting for the first time in a ring tonight. They’ve been talking trash from afar, how will that work face to face?
– Cena/Rusev feud. We get a clip of a WWE.com interview with John Cena, who loves this country. Cena says there is “documented proof” that he loves this country… Whatever that means… Cena wants to represent the U.S. by winning the title and becoming the ambassador…. Ummm, why did it take you this long to come to this decision? Cena says he’s doing this for his country and not for himself… The announcers spend some time talking about this match, and actually do a good job with it. Otunga points out this is very much like Rocky IV… No shit… LOL
– Tonight on Raw, YOU can choose Randy Orton’s opponent… Orton vs. Kane? Big Show? OR Seth Rollins & J&J Security? Seriously? You’re sticking Seth and Orton in the ring together AGAIN right before the PPV? Jesus…. I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt though, the match hasn’t happened yet.
The WWE Raw Report 3/23/15 from the Staples Center in Los Angeles, CA
17,540 fans in the Staples Center and six days away from Mania… Guest Stars are Snoop Dogg and Bill Simmons.
– This is it guys…. We’ve got three hours to put this PPV over the top. They’ve got 9 matches to sell and two celebrities hosting the show tonight… Let’s see what they can do!!! 17,540 fans in the Staples Center and six days away from Mania…
– As promised, Raw kicks off with the Stinger. The lights go black, a Sting video on the Tron, and out comes STING!!! How did he get past HHH in the back? HHH has known this was opening the show for hours… Michael Cole points out that it was 14 YEARS AGO TODAY that WCW went out of business… Ouch. Good timing though… Stinger enters the ring. “Sting” chants as he puts over getting to open up a Raw. Sting talks about watching HHH climb the WWE ladder for the last 14 years using undermining tactics. Sting says HHH thinks he’s unstoppable. Sting says it’s ridiculous to fight for WCW at this point… Instead, Sting is simply here to take HHH down…
Cue Stephanie McMahon, ARGH… She takes her good old time walking to the ring to address Sting. She talks about Sting being the last holdout from WCW and Sting FINALLY made it to the big time. She tells Sting to soak it in. Sting calls Steph the spoiled brat that was handed everything but believes she earned it. Steph thinks Sting is intimidated by WWE because it’s so much bigger than WCW was. Steph reminds Sting that her father destroyed WCW. Steph admired Sting’s loyalty, but dogs are loyal too. She’d compare Sting to a dog, but she doesn’t want to insult dogs. Steph says Sting lost everything when he lost WCW, and he was lose what dignity he has left when HHH defeats him at Mania… She calls Sting a face painted freak.
Stephanie tries to slap Sting, but Sting catches her hind… AND HERE COMES HHH…. Oddly HHH is SO CONCERNED that he walks to the ring. Stephanie exits the ring as HHH goes around to check on her. Trips removes his sports coat and walks up to the apron. Stephanie stops HHH and hands him his SLEDGEHAMMER from under the ring… Sting whips out his baseball bat…. HHH now thinks twice about entering… HHH eventually decides against entering and he and Steph walk off.
Sting DROPS THE BAT and dares HHH to enter. HHH thinks about getting in the ring, but Steph tells him to save it for WrestleMania… The Authority walk up the ramp as Sting’s music plays the segment out.
– Backstage, we see AJ Lee and Paige discussing who will get the championship match against Nikki Bella later tonight.
– Tag Team action is up next with members of the IC Title Ladder Match. It’s Ambrose and Truth vs. Stardust & Harper.
–Commercial Break–
1. Dean Ambrose & R-Truth vs. Luke Harper & Stardust
Wade Barrett on commentary. “Cody” chants to start as Stardust and Truth get things going. Truth gets the better of that and Dean and Harper tag in. Dean with some stiff shots on Harper, forearms, dropkick against the ropes, and a LA MAGISTRAL??? OK! Ambrose with a bulldog on Harper, Stardust comes in to prevent a pin. Truth & Dean send Harper & Cody to the floor as we go off to commercial…
Continuing on the App, Stardust cartwheels and taunts Dean, only to get slapped, lol… Ambrose goes to work on Cody and damn Dean is on the money tonight. Harper tags back in but he gets dropped as well, Ambrose tries a top rope move, but Cody distracts and Dean runs into a BIG BOOT from Harper!!! The heels take over control. Gourdbuster by Cody, and we’re headed back to USA…
Back from commercial, Dean tries to fight his way out of the heel corner but eats an Alabama Slammer from Cody for 2… Harper catapults Dean’s throat into the middle rope for 2… Harper with a swinging side slam for another near fall on Dean. Cody back in, he tries a Superplex OFF THE TOP, but gets a Super Gourdbuster instead… Then Harper knocks Ambrose off the top rope…. Harper comes over to stalk Dean but eats a nasty ass clothesline from Ambrose on the floor… Back inside, Dean lands a Tornado DDT on Harper and it’s finally hot tag time to Truth and Cody Rhodes… Truth with a sit out Gourd buster on Cody but Harper breaks the count…
Harper with a Big Boot to Dean, Big Boot to Truth… meanwhile Dean comes ricocheting back with a nasty clothesline that sends Harper to the floor… And SUICIDE dive by Ambrose out onto Luke… Meanwhile, back inside Truth drops Stardust with a jumping impaler and this thing is over in 10:38…
Bad News Barrett takes off immediately after the match…. R-Truth and Dean Ambrose “dance” together…
–Commercial Break–
– On the WWE App, Tom Phillips is interrupted by The Ascension… Somehow they have jobbed there way into WrestleMania and the Andre Battle Royal… So unless they’re doing more than 20 guys, all 20 guys have now been named… Guess they couldn’t make it to the Preshow Tag Title match, Battle Royal fodder it is. Actually, given their recent jobs I’m a bit surprised they made ANY match.
– Renee Young is on the stage with the Special Olympics CEO and several of the ambassadors and athletes competing in this year’s Special Olympics. WWE announces their partnership this year.
– Prerecorded Roman Reigns interview is aired. It’s short and nothing. Time filler.
– JBL basically calls anyone who orders WrestleMania on PPV for $65 an idiot when it’s $10 on WWE Network… Well, yeah.
– Bill Simmons is out next to do commentary for a 10-Man Tag match representing Battle Royal members.
– We catch Miz and Sandow interviewing Will Ferrell and Kevin Hart… The actors put over how great stunt doubles are and assistants are and how great Sandow looks… Miz sends Sandow off to get a water…. Will Ferrell tags along… Lol… This was short, but pretty cool seeing Will and Kevin in there…
–Commercial Break–
2. The Prime Time Players, Zack Ryder, Erick Rowan, & Ryback vs. The Miz, Damien Sandow, The Ascension, & Adam Rose
Wow, so Ascension even make it back to Raw… Well, this is quite the collection of misfits. I think maybe they literally drew names out a hat for this one. BILL SIMMONS on commentary to watch wits with JBL. Crowd is loving them some Sandow on the apron. The PTP have their way with Miz. Miz takes over and teases tagging Sandow, but tags Rose instead. Rowan and Ryder get in some of their stuff on Rose. Ascension distracts Zack and the heels take over on him. The Ascension work over Ryder. SANDOW FINALLY TAGS IN. Sandow hits Miz moves, and Miz gets pissy and wants tagged in, NOW… Miz tags in, but takes a facebuster from Ryder and HOT TAG TO RYBACK…. Ryback knocks everyone off the apron and a Thesz Press and Speinbuster on Miz. INSANE PRESS THROW from Ryback onto Adam Rose… DOUBLE MEATHOOK ON THE ASCENSION…. Miz attacks Ryback from behind but runs into a MEATHOOK…. SHELL SHOCK ENDS IT in 5:47… Ryback came out looking strong here… And Zack Ryder just won a match on Raw… Woo Woo Woo, You Know it!
– Find out who Orton faces, NEXT!!!
–Commercial Break–
– Did the fans choose, Big Show, Kane or the team of Rollins & J&J? Hmmm, let’s find out…
And with 77% of the vote, it’s Seth and J&J… What a shocker…
3. Randy Orton vs. Seth Rollins & J&J Security
This will be a handicap match. Mercury to start. Joey fails. Seth tags teasing in but Noble tags in and eats a Garvin Stomp. Orton thing flings Noble out of the ring and goes after Seth, but Mercury hits him from behind. And then Rollins cracks Orton from behind, and Noble takes over on offense… Noble is soooo small. Noble stomps and talks trash to Orton until Randy comes back and beats down both members of J&J…. Double suspension DDT on both men!!! Seth Rollins stands outside on the floor just watching. Orton sets up for the RKO, Seth rushes in for the Curb Stomp, but misses… Orton throws Mercury from the ring, he chases Seth from the ring, and RKO to Noble ends it in 3:18.
Seth Rollins can only watch from the aisle, angrily as he refuses to get physical with Randy. Smart booking, thankfully…
– They CONTINUE to shill the Network, $9.99 at the end of every segment of the show… Talk about hard sell….
– We get a look at the WWE.com Cena interview from last week. We learn that Jack Swagger meets Rusev later tonight.
– Backstage, Paige and AJ Lee are still discussing who will get the title shot with Nikki. AJ thinks this is a mind game, Paige agrees, but the two start bickering. Paige calls AJ CRAZY! Uh oh! It looks like Paige is taking the title shot while AJ tries to explain this is all a trap.
–Commercial Break–
4. WWE Divas Champion Nikki Bella (w/Brie) vs. Paige (w/AJ Lee)
It’s all Paige to start, Nikki takes a series of knees that sends her to the floor… Finally back inside, Nikki takes over and does pushups to mock Paige. Paige makes another comeback, but Nikki rolls to the floor… Paige comes off the apron with a running clothesline to drop Nikki outside. Back inside again, Nikki hits Paige with sort of a Stunner face first onto her knee for 2. We head to commercial.
On the WWE App, Nikki maintains control throughout the entire break, gaining several near falls. Nikki hooks a chinlock as we head back to USA.
Back from break, Nikki hits a spinebuster for 2. Paige finally fires back, but the girls land a double clothesline on each other. Paige finally makes a comeback, three short arm clotheslines and a dropkick gets 2. Paige misses something off the ropes and Nikki covers for another close fall. Nikki gets mad and… Removes her bracelets??? Nikki goes for a KO punch, but misses, and Paige lands a Superkick!!! 1….2…Nikki kicks out. Nikki blocks the RamPaige with an inside cradle for 2… Damn there’s a lot of falls… Nikki with the Alabama Slam. 1…2….Paige kicks out!!!
Nikki goes for the Rack Attack, Paige escapes… RAMPAIGE!!!!!! 1……………..2……………………NIKKI KICKS OUT!!!!!!!!
Paige goes after Nikki and they spill to the floor. Brie starts to get involved, but AJ tosses her into the barricade. Paige comes up behind AJ and startles her, AJ turns around and lays out Paige… On accident…. Now Paige is out, and Nikki takes her inside for the Rack Attack… And the win in 10:40.
After the match, AJ comes back to explain herself to Paihe, but Paige spears AJ!!! AJ & Paige begin brawling around the ring with each other and leave seperately. It would seem as though the Bellas plan has worked!!!
– Tonight it’s Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler and YOU PICK THE REFEREE!!! Barrett, Truth, Ambrose, Stardust, or Harper. For curiosity I’d love to see Harper, but if I were voting I’d go Ambrose. Either way, it’d be fun…
–Commercial Break–
– It’s Snoop Dogg headed to the ring… Fo shizzle. I think… He’s dancing his way out with four Divas. Snoop hits the ring and puts over himself “SnoopMania” and WrestleMania. Snoop gets interrupted by….. AXELMANIA!!!!!! AxelMania is not a west coast thing, an east coast thing, it’s a World Wide thing!!! AXELMANIA IS RUNNING WILD!!!! Curtis Axel slides in the ring to confront snoop as the fans chant “AxelMania”. Curtis mocks Snoop, Bow wow wow yippee yo yippee yay, Axelmania is here to stay. Snoop says Curtis is missing the most important Mania of all… THIS ONE…..
IT’S HULK HOGAN!!!!!! HULKAMANIA IS HEADED TO THE RING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hulk and Snoop do some posing as Curtis watches on. “Hogan” chants. Well Let me tell you something brother!!!! Hogan talks about slamming Andre and Hulkamania living forever. SnoopaMania’s first LP was gonna drop it likes it hot forever… But Axelmania??? Hogan wants to know what Axel is smoking, and suggests Snoop would know.
AXEL RIPS OFF HIS SHIRT!!!! Axel asks Hogan what he’s gonna do?????? Axel takes a swing at Hulk, Hogan blocks it and drives Curtis with a right hand!!! Snoop then tosses Axel out of the ring…. Snoop rips his shirt off to reveal a HULKAMANIA shirt… I assume this should get some press, which was the whole point heading into Mania… If this had to be a segment, they used it wisely…
– We get a clip from last week’s Brock Lesnar promo. He’s going to F*** UP Roman Reigns… Period… They’re face to face tonight!
–Commercial Break–
– WWE App interview with Adam Rose. He continues his internet feud with Zack Ryder. Zack Ryder interrupts and calls Rose out right now. Rose has a schedule and doesn’t have time… Adam takes off… Oooooo-Kay….
5. Cesaro, Tyson Kidd, & Natalya vs. Los Matadores & Torito
The Usos on commentary. It looks like we’re going to get Nattie vs. Torito, but Tyson tags himself in to Nattie’s dismay. The heels take over and hit the Giant swing into the dropkick for a near fall… Tyson comes off the top into a dropkick and we get a Matador hot tag. Crowd doesn’t give a crap for the first time tonight. Torito gets a near fall on Cesaro off a flying butt press. Matadores tease a fucking 619 but hit a seated drop instead. Tyson lays the Matador out on the floor. Torito tags in with Nattie… Nattie catches a near fall, then tries a Powerbomb, but Torito counters into a sunset flip for the win in 4:16… This was pretty crappy, but you can’t win them all….
– Kane runs into Bad News Barrett in the locker room. Kane comes to take the IC Title from Barrett in order to deliver it at WrestleMania… Barrett refuses, so Kane threatens to vacate the belt if he doesn’t. BNB reluctantly hands the title over. Kane mocks Barrett’s chances of regaining the title at WrestleMania.
– Swagger vs. Rusev is next.
–Commercial Break–
– WWE App shows the Rusev promo where he works out hardcore for Cena, old school Rocky IV style…
– 8-Man Tag on Smackdown. Cena, Reigns, Bryan & Henry vs. Rollins, Big Show, Kane & Bray Wyatt… I think that was originally the dark match for tonight, so…. That’s a weird ass match, I’ll say that much. I’m still confused how Henry is a face, but all righty.
6. U.S. Champion Rusev vs. Jack Swagger
No Lana still. Real smooth move WWE. “We Want Lana” chants as Rusev dominates. Swagger makes an ill attempt at a comeback, but Rusev just smashes him down. Swagger finally fights back sand lands a big boot. WE THE PEOPLE, Swagger goes for a Swagger Bomb, but Rusev up with the savatte kick, but Swagger catches and goes for the Ankle Lock!!! Rusev frees himself but Swagger slams him down… The two wind up in the corner, and Rusev takes Swags out… Running superkick to the THROAT of Swagger… UGH!!! Accolade and this thing is over in 4:35…
Rusev refuses to release the hold after the match… Here comes SUPERMAN CENA, complete with THEME MUSIC to make the save… The two men tackle each other twice… Rusev escapes, Cena chases out after him and Rusev blasts him and sends Cena into the barricade hard… Cena gets thrown into the steel post and then completely OVER the announce table and Cena bounces off a chair… LMAO, wow…. Rusev grabs his Russian flag and leaves in celebration while Cena is laid out behind the announce desk…
As Cena crawls back towards the ring, Rusev turns around and return with a JUMPING SIDE KICK to the face of Cena!!!!!! Nice… Rusev clears the announce table, a monitor almost bounces into the crowd… Rusev slams Cena chest first onto the table. ACCOLADE ON THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!!!!!! Cena passes out as Rusev tries to break him in half…. We’ve got a half dozen officials out there before Rusev finally releases and celebrates in the ring with his U.S. Title and the big Russian flag drops from the ceiling.
Now THAT was good…
–Commercial Break–
– Dean Ambrose on the WWE App. He talks about wanting to be the referee for the Bryan vs. Ziggler match.
– They hype the interview with HHH and Arnold Schwarzenegger on the Network after Raw.
– BRAY WYATT on his way to the ring!!! Bray wants to know why people hide from the truth… Are they afraid? Embarrassed? Reality can be a difficult pill to swallow, but we are all guilty because we all hate the people we have become. All we see is the color green and we wear makeup to cover up the ugliness inside of us. We are all liars. Wyatt isn’t like us, he’s a lot of things but he’s not a liar. His tongue is the sword of truth. “UNDERTAKER” chants. Wyatt promises to give the fans the truth, the Undertaker is just like the fans, because he too is a liar. Taker tries to hide his loss, he tries to deny that he wants his soul sent free… But don’t worry Taker, Bray is here to take him back to the other side…
The lights begin to flicker, but Taker no longer controls these spirits… They belong to Bray!!! Wyatt controls the light and the dark…
WOW this is a pretty wicked awesome promo… The delivery is amazing…. Undertaker’s fate will be sealed with Sister Abigails kiss and Wyatt will take his place among the God’s as the new face of fear… This promo is so good it goes from the crowd against Bray to cheering him… Wyatt says at WrestleMania Taker can rest in peace, and mocks the Undertaker’s kneeling stance… The lights flicker and static noise as Bray now controls the power…
If you can only have one guy out here to drive this match home, they couldn’t have done a better job… This promo was amazing…
–Commercial Break–
– WWE App with Dolph Ziggler and Renee Young doing some sort of comedy routine, I don’t know who they’re trying to be… It turns into a IC Title WrestleMania promo and then a promo for tonight. Then more comedy. I’m lost, but somehow Renee made it sexy. lol
– The final inductee into the 2015 WWE Hall of Fame is….. KEVIN NASH…. DIESEL….
– Backstage Tyson Kidd is talking sexy to his Burger King and he has his headphones on… Natalya thinks he’s talking to her. She finds out that CHICKEN FRIES ARE BACK AT BURGER KING! She gets upset but then learns that she enjoys Chicken Fries as well, she enjoys them a little TOO much… This is somewhat funny, then turns creepy…
– Daniel Bryan on his way to the ring… Ziggles is out next….
For some reason, the IC Title is now hanging above the ring…. Ummm, this isn’t Levi’s Stadium….
Now we find out who the referee will be??? Ambrose wins with 57% of the vote…
–Commercial Break–
7. Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler, Special Referee Dean Ambrose
We get a couple of stand offs and some mat work to start. Bryan takes over with some strikes, but Ziggler is right back with an elbow drop for 2. Ziggler slaps Bryan, and Bryan slaps the shit out of Ziggler, and Ambrose loves it all… Ziggler sends Bryan outside, but Daniel skins the cat back inside and head scissors Dolph to the floor… Bryan with a baseball slide dropkick on Ziggles… Bryan tries a move off the apron but Ziggler ducks, and Dolph clotheslines Bryan over the time keeper barricade as we head to commercial…
WWE App action continues, both men are still down and out. Ambrose finally starts a count, but both men make it back in on 8. Bryan lays in with YES kicks to the chest of Ziggler. Bryan misses the big one to the head, and Ziggler counters with a jumping spike DDT for a near fall!!! Dolph with the splash in the corner and a neckbreaker gets another 2 count as we head back to USA…
Back from break, Ziggler has Bryan in a sleeper, Daniel escapes and tries a reverse roll up for 2… Bryan with a GERMAN SUPLEX! 1…2…Ziggler kicks out… Bryan goes up top but Dolph crotches him. The two fight on the top rope, Ziggler gets knocked off. But Ziggler jumps right back up and hits a FACEBUSTER OFF THE TOP. 1…..2….Bryan kicks out! Dolph tries the Zigzag, but Bryan holds the ropes.
Bryan tries a backslide, Ziggler fights it and reverses it for a near fall..
Bryan comes back with a Superkick for his own near fall…
Dueling chants begin for the wrestlers. Bryan with more Yes Kicks, and a dropkick in the corner. Bryan charges for a second dropkick but runs into a SUPERKICK from Ziggler… AND A ZIGZAG!!!! 1……………2……………………….3!!!!!
Ziggler wins AGAIN in 10:52….
Ambrose lays Ziggler out with Dirty Deeds after the match… And Ambrose grabs a LADDER!!! And THIS is why the IC Title is above the ring….
Ambrose climbs up the ladder, but Bad News Barrett pulls him down. R-Truth, Stardust, and Harper all join in on the 7 man brawl… Diurty Deeds on Truth, everyone getting laid out. Bull Hammer on Bryan. Ziggler superkicks Barrett. Stardust with some funky move to Dolph… Stardust & Ambrose fight at the top of the ladder, but Harper knocks them over, then the ladder clips Harper… Everyone is down. Man, I can’t tell if Harper was hurt for real or not, that looked awkward… Hope all is well. We end the segment with all 7 men down in the ring and nobody has the IC Title…
– Paul Heyman is shown backstage, he knocks on Brock’s dressing room door and tells him IT’S TIME….
– WWE App features William Regal to lend some insight into the IC Title Ladder Match. Regal talks about competing with the IC Title at WrestleMania against RVD, he says he wore the title upside down he was so nervous. So he can’t fathom how complicated this ladder match will be.
– LL Cool J explains the definition of “Mania” and WrestleMania
–Commercial Break–
It’s time for the final segment of the night. For all intents and purposes, this is the final big angle segment heading into Mania… This is it peoples!!!
– BROCK LESNAR AND PAUL HEYMAN on their way to the ring… Heyman starts off the promo. Heyman says if hasn’t sold the fans on watching Brock Lesnar kill Roman Reigns at WrestleMania by now, there’s nothing more he can say. Then he goes on to say a lot more. lol…. Heyman sells this match as a FIGHT and says Brock will MANGLE Reigns and we will get our money’s worth. Either Lesnar is everything Paul says he is, or he isn’t. And either Reigns is everything he’s hyped up to be or he isn’t. It’s as simple as that. Only one man can win, and one will fail. Brock makes everyone failures that compete against him. Heyman talks about Brock killing Taker and Cena, and that’s why Brock is champ, and that’s why Brock is closing this show. Heyman continues with an amazing promo, stating that Brock compares the WWE title to Reigns stealing his wife, taking food from his children and renaming them Reigns. This title means everything to Brock. Brock looks at Paul all funky like, lol… This is a good promo. Heyman says Reigns hates to eb told he can’t, but Brock Lesnar says he CAN’T, and therefore Roman Reigns, YOU WON’T!
Cue Roman Reigns through the crowd… Heyman leaves the ring as Brock and Reigns stare each other down with no microphone in sight…
Lesnar holds the title belt over Roman’s head to taunt him, and Reigns snatches it from Brock!!! Lesnar jerks it back and the two men struggle for the belt as the show goes off the air…. WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT???? Who thought THAT was a good idea???? I was with them until it just abruptly ended so oddly. They just stand there both holding the belt. It was like a photo op… Not a single punch thrown but they both want the belt???
Oh, and the crowd was chanting for Lesnar during everything with Reigns, and the smart marks haven’t even filed in yet… So Reigns has a long road this weekend… I hope Lesnar wins and gets this crap over with.
That’s all folks, see you at WrestleMania!!!
