Summer Apocalypse 2003-08-22 from St. Petersburg Coliseum in St. Petersburg, Fla
Champions
World: Steve Corino
GTC: Simon Diamond & CW Anderson
Nosawa & B-Boy vs. Los Maximos
So I guess the CMLL Champions didn’t show up tonight. I expect this match to be full of fuck ups. Joel and B-Boy start off and do some back and forth stuff. Joel with a rana and a head scissor that sends Boy to the floor. Nosawa sneaks in and super kicks Joel and hits a shinning wizard. Jose comes in now and takes down Nosawa they lock in the boston crab/camel clutch combo. Northern lights by Joel but B-Boy kicks out. Joel goes for a rana but B-Boy catches him and power bombs him into the turnbuckle. Joel is seated in the corner and B-Boy just jumps on his face. Nosawa tags in and hits a charging back elbow in the corner. Joel rolls to the floor and Nosawa follows and throws him into the crowd. Back in Joel reverses an irish whip and hits a belly to belly overhead throw. Tag to Jose and he climbs the top rope and lands an elbow drop. Nosawa rolls through a sunset flip attempt by Jose and hits a seated drop kick for 2. B-Boy tags in and kicks Jose in the back a few times. B-Boy with some chops in the corner. Jose goes for a sunset flip but B-Boy just jumps onto Jose’s chest. He does it again then drops an elbow for 2. Tag to Nosawa and he kicks Jose low. B-Boy back in he goes for a clothesline but Jose ducks and hits a rana. B-Boy fights right back with a inverted DDT. Irish whip but Jose slides through the legs of B-Boy and hits an enziguri. Tags on both ends. Joel comes in and cleans house. Nosawa and B-Boy go to the floor and Jose dives onto them. Joel now with an asai moonsault onto everyone. Back in the ring B-Boy with a fishermens buster. Joel with a piledriver type move. Nosawa with a michinoku driver and then he goes up top. Big mistake. Tripped up and the Spanish fly for three in 10.46. Wow and with nothing so glaringly bad that I want to meet the Maximos just so I can verbally berate them, I actually enjoy the match.
Rich Criado vs. Mana
Well this is going to be a squash. Criado blocks some punches but then gets head butted down. Mana with two CRAZY loud chops. Mana hits a slam and senton. He picks up Criado like he is going for a side slam but then trhows him back so he lands on his stomach. Very cool looking move. Mana misses a corner charge and Criado goes up top but Mana knocks him to the buckle. Mana with a super samoan drop for the win in 2.21. I mean not that I care one way or the other but does this mean we aren’t getting the Criado/Nosawa rematch that was announced?
Sonjay Dutt vs. Jimmy Yang
Yang back Dutt into the corner and slaps him on the chest. A few go behind reversals and Yang gets shit for going to the ropes instead of breaking the hold. Dutt twirls around Yang twice before taking him down with a head scissor. It makes me legit dizzy. Dutt hits a crazy spring board dive where he twists like 3 times in the air. Drop kick by Dutt for 2. Yang sent to the corner Dutt charges but Yang toe holds him into the buckle. Yang with a spin kick that lays out Dutt. They go to the floor and Yang throws Dutt into the guardrail a few times. Yang with chops and Dutt does the twirl around thing again into an octopus stretch. Yang counters that with a backbreaker. Dutt with a drop kick and springboard leg drop for 2. Dutt with a flying back elbow for 2. Yang with a jaw breaker to take back over. Dutt gets the boot up on a corner charge. Dutt runs at Yang, Yang goes for a tilt a whirl back breaker but Dutt spins into a DDT. Dutt with a leaping neck breaker for 2. Dutt with a superrana for 2. Yang goes for a back drop but Dutt lands on his feet. Yang boots him in the gut. Dutt sends Yang to the and charges but gets back dropped to the apron. Dutt able to land on his feet and climb the turnbuckle. Dutt leaps off with a 450 landing on Yang’s shoulders and then going into a rana that Yang takes right on the top of his head but only gets a 2 count. Dutt goes back up top with a crossbody attempt but Yang sticks his knee out and it’s a rib breaker. Yang goes up top and lands Yang time for the win in 11.19. That match was super good!
Tony Mamaluke vs. Mikey Whipwreck (w/ Sinister Minister)
Some comedy to start. Nice back and forth opening spot ends with a Whipwreck clothesline. Mikey misses a leg drop on the apron and Mamaluke knocks him to floor and then hits a dive. Mikey reverses an irish whip and Mamaluke goes into the crowd. Mikey runs and dives over the guardrail but he misses. Mamaluke DDTs Mikey on the floor. Mamaluke faces two chairs towards each other. He charges Mikey who is up against the apron. Mikey moves and the slams Mamaluke into the chairs. Back in the ring Mikey with a submission. Mikey with a whippersnapper but Mamaluke hooks the top rope so he didn’t take the full effect of the move. Mamaluke takes over now. Slingshot leg drop to the apron, clothesline and knee to the stomach get a two count. Mamaluke locks in an arm bar but Mikey powers up and hits a sitout tiger bomb. Mikey hits a leaping jawbreaker and whippersnapper but only gets 2! Mokey ducks a front kick and hits a superkick for 2. Mikey goes up top but Mamaluke knocks him down and pulls him off the top rope with a DDT for 2. Mamaluke goes up top but Minister pokes him in the asshole with his cane and then Mamaluke falls crotch first. Super whippersnapper for 3 after 8.03. Decent match with a nice finish. I forgot to mention earlier that MLW was finally added replays to their shows. Also Joey ruined things that are probably going to be announced on TV or in promos later tonight. War Games Match and Junior Title Tournament coming next month.
Falls Count Anywhere Match: Samoan Island Tribe vs. Monsta Mac & B-Boy
Another no show as Mafia isn’t here tonight. Why is this still a falls count anywhere then? Mac gets thrown to the floor and they throw B-Boy through the air. Mac back in and he gets double team Spin bustered. Ekmo clotheslines Mac to the floor and hits a super kick on B-Boy. They go to the floor. Samu is destroying B-Boy as Ekmo takes on Mac. Styles says Mafia was jumped in the parking lot by the Samoans. I find that some what hard to believe. Total domination by the Samoans. Mac with a hard chair shot to Ekmo’s back in the ring. Ekmo reverses a corner whip and Mac hits the chair that he had propped up in the corner. Swinging urinagi by Ekmo. Samu kills B-Boy with a chair. B-Boy and Mac try to come back. It doesn’t last. B-Boy again gets a chair bent over his head. Mac jumps of a ladder that has been brought into the ring but is countered. B-Boy is on a table outside of the ring. Ekmo climbs the top rope and hits a splash through the table on the floor!!!!!!! The Samoans pick up the win in 8.10. Another fun brawl involving the Island Tribe and a sick move to finish the match.
Straight Edge Rules Match: CM Punk (w/ Nosawa) vs. Raven
Joey questions why Nosawa is with Punk. We still don’t know the rules to this match. Punk on the mic and he of course trashes the fans. Punks says he is better then everyone because he is straight edge. This makes the fans chant “you fucking suck” at him. Punk says that rules are that there will be DQs and countouts and that this is an old school match. Punk has is own ref for the match. The ref has is own special introduction. They say he is from the Straight Edge Wrestling Federation and that at age 12 he turned his parents in for smoking pot. HAHA Punk jumps up and down in excitement for this. CM Punk requests that no one drink alcohol during the match. Punk and the ref try to get an old man ejected. This is some fun stuff here. Raven just hanging in the corner the whole time. Fans start to chante “Raven’s rules”. Raven out wrestling Punk to start but Punk able to beat down Raven in the corner. Raven quickly goes for the DDT but Punk bails. Raven with a noggin knocker on Punk and Nosawa. Back in the ring Raven again beats on Punk. Raven throws Punk to the floor. Raven goes to whip Punk to the guardrail but the ref jumps in the way and says he will get DQed. Punk brings a chair into the ring but Raven gets it. Again he is threatened with DQ. The ref gets rid of the chair as Punk hits a low blow. Nosawa distracts the ref and Punk hits Raven in the stomach with the chair. Punk puts the chair in the corner and whips Raven into it as Nosawa again gives distraction. Raven thrown to the floor and he’s sent into the guardrail behind the refs back. Punk hits Raven with a mic and the ref simply turns away to not see it. Punk tries to hit Raven with a chair but Raven moves and the chair bounces off the ropes into Punk. Both men down for a 9 count. Back up and Raven takes over a few clotheslines and a Mr. Wrestling 2 knee lift. Bulldog from Raven for 2. Drop toe hold to the chair but the ref moves it so its just a regular drop toe hold. Raven argues to the ref and Punk with a school boy. Fast count but only a 2. Raven with a superkick for 2! Nosawa holds Raven and Punk charges but Raven moves. DDT by Raven. Raven has the win but the ref fakes a shoulder injury. Raven goes to DDT the ref but gets school boyed again this time for the 3. Time of the match was 9.24. While predictable it did what it need to do. These guys always put on a nice show.
Michael Shane & Francine vs. Norman Smiley & GI Ho
Norman Smiley’s whole thing is so fucking hilarious. Francine and Ho start off but Ho plays to the crowd and Francine and Shane switch behind her back. Shane grabs her but Smiley makes the save. Shane and Smiley now Shane goes for a leap from but Smiley stops running and twirls and then punches Shane. Shane goes for a crossbody but gets caught and Smiley with the big swinging bodyslam. Shane flips out of a suplex and they each nail a clothesline. The girls tag in now and we get the roll around on the mat cat fight. Shane goes for a powerbomb on Ho but Smiley punches Shane in the back of the head. Ho with a rana and Shane makes it look awesome. Smiley dumps Shane to the floor and does the big wiggle on Francine. Shane with a superkick to Smiley and then he boots Ho in the face. Shane pulls out handcuff and they lock Smiley to the bottom rope. Well she’s trying to but it’s taking forever. Shane brings a table in the ring and splashes Ho from the top rope through the table for the win at 5.42. I was surprised when the ref counted the fall. I kinda thought it was going to be thrown out after it broke down.
Homicide vs. “Evil F’N Show” Jerry Lynn (w/ Sinister Minister)
This two had a hell of a match at the last show. Mat work to start off. Homicide with some chops in the corner and then he sends Lynn the opposite way and charges with a forearm. Lynn now sends Homicide to the corner and charges with the same. Lynn takes over for a bit and then Homicide with a head scissor and Lynn goes to the floor. Homicide with an overhead belly to belly and Lynn again goes to the floor. Homicide with the somersault dive through the ropes. Lynn back in and Homicide is on the apron. After some distraction from Minister Lynn drags Homicide over the rope hooks his feet on the top rope and then drops him straight down onto his head with a DDT! It’s nasty looking and Homicide quickly rolls out of the ring. The ref hops out to check on him. Lynn stays back for a minute but then jumps out of the ring and attacks. Back in the ring Lynn remains in control. A flapjack and leg drop combo gets 2. Homicide attempts a comeback but Lynn counters Homicide with a sunset flip powerbomb of the second rope. Lynn back in control as we are 12 minutes into the match. Homicide blocks a DDT by hooking the top rope. Lynn goes for a suplex but Homicide flips out of it and hits an ace crusher. They are down for an 8 count. Homicide comes back with a flying forearm and tbone suplex for 2. Lynn with a swinging single arm DDT for a near fall. Lynn setting up the cradle piledriver but Homicide trips him up and slingshots him into the turnbuckle. Super rana by Homicide but Minister pulls the ref out of the ring. Homicide is bleeding for some reason. Lynn tries to use the ring bell but Homicide knocks it out of his hands and bulldogs him onto it and gets 2. TKO by Lynn and it almost gets him the victory. Lynn goes for a clothesline but Homicide cradles him and gets the pin in 16.07. Lynn attacks after the match and hits the cradle piledriver. Lynn comes off the second rope with the ring bell to the throat of Homicide. Nowhere near what the first one was.
Global Tag Team Crown Champions Extreme Horsemen vs. “Dr. Death” Steve Williams & Sandman
I wonder if the Horsemen will have titles tonight. Williams yet again going after the belts. Sandman seems extra drunk. The champs have belts! Remember Corino is suspended tonight, aka booked in Japan. The champs attack before the bell. Williams quickly fights back with a double clothesline. Williams on the offense against CW Anderson and he tags in Sandman. Anderson reverses a corner whip and Sandman hits as Simon Diamond tags in. Diamond doesn’t do much and tags out to Anderson. Anderson with some punches and kicks and he tags back to Simon who hits a snap suplex for 2. They hit a double seated drop kick. Anderson now in and he hits a clothesline and tags out. Diamond ducks his head and Sandman with a DDT and the rolling rock. Tag made and Williams comes in the ring with a top rope shoulder block on Diamond. Anderson charges in and gets spinebustered. Powerslam on Diamond for 2. Williams goes for the back drop driver on Anderson but Diamond superkicks Williams. PJ Friedman shows up nails Anderson with a chair and runs away. I don’t think anyone in the crowd knows who he is. Williams slams Anderson off the top rope and hits the back drop driver on Diamond. Someone comes out in a lucha mask and breaks up the pin. Williams goes after him but gets pulled down on the top rope. Joey thinks it’s Corino but it looks nothing like his body type. I guess that’s how it’s going to play out on TV. Sandman gets a chair superkicked into his face and Anderson hits a spine buster on the chair to retain the titles in 7.09. This match was pretty garbage with a really stupid finish.
Spike Match: “Fallen Angel” Christopher Daniels (w/ Sinister Minister) vs. Sabu (w/ Bill Alfonso)
Sabu’s arm is all bandaged up from his match last month with Mikey Whipwreck. Bill Alfonso has an arm brace on also. Not entirely sure what the rules of a Spike Match are. Daniels tries hard to stay away from Sabu to start. Back and forth to begin. So there is a steel spike on the outside of the ring that they can get and use. Daniels chokes Sabu on the rope and goes for the spike but Sabu drop kicks his legs and puts on a leg lock. Daniels hammers Sabu in the back of the neck and Sabu rolls to the floor. Four minutes into the match and not much has happened which tells me these guys are preparing to go twenty. Back in the ring Sabu again takes out the legs and hits a slingshot leg lariat. Sabu throws a chair in the face of Daniels and hits the triple jump moonsault. Sabu goes for the spike but Minister blocks his way allowing Daniels to nail him from behind. Snapmare and seated drop kick by Daniels for a 2 count. Daniels hits a the ropes and comes off with a swinging neckbreaker for 2. Sabu with a jaw breaker and he goes for the spike again but Daniels gets him from behind and slams him into the guardrail. Daniels throws Sabu back in the ring and hits a urinagi and two BMEs but can’t get a three. Daniels goes to the aisle and gets the spike. Sabu blocks and picks up the spike but Daniels counters with a downward spiral into a submission. Daniels with two shinning enziguris and Sabu rolls to the floor. Daniels sets up a table on the floor and puts Sabu on it. Daniels goes up top but Alfonso distracts him. Sabu and Daniels fight over who goes through the table from the top. Daniels ends up falling into the ring and Sabu comes off the top with a leg drop for 2. Alfonso puts a table in the ring. Daniels with a STO for 2. Sabu with a DDT that almost gets 3. Daniels set up on the table and Sabu with the Arabian Buster to the back of the head through the table. Sinister Minister comes in the ring with the spike and goes after Alfonso. Mikey Whipwreck comes in a tries to throw fire at Sabu but Alfonso throws water on him. HAHA that’s awesome. Sabu knocks Mikey out of the ring and gets the spike. He nails Daniels with it a few times and locks in the camel clutch while jabbing the spike into the eye of Daniels. Sabu gets the submission victory in 15.15. Well I’m a big fan of both these guys and was expecting much more from this. They didn’t seem to click. The spot with Mikey and Alfonso was great.
Jerry “The King” Lawler vs. Terry Funk
I’m very nervous as there is still 30 minutes left in the show and will kill myself if this match goes on for that long. Lawler has been hired by the Extreme Horsemen to collect the bounty on Funk. Haha they do a tale of the tape and one of the things says “years pro” and it says 1965 for Funk which is obviously his debut year. But if you read it they way the wrote it it looks like he’s been wrestling for 1,965 years. It’s funny cause he’s so old. Lawler on the mic talks about how Funk has been around for way to long. Lawler meanwhile has been wrestling for only 5 less years. Bell rings and we have 25 minutes of show left. Lawler punches Funk to the floor. Funk now on the apron but Lawler not letting him back in the ring. Funk punched off the apron through a table on the floor. This match is all Lawler and he hits a piledriver on the floor. In the ring now and Lawler with another piledriver this time onto a chair. Second rope fist drop by Lawler. Lawler puts a chair in the corner and goes to ram Funk into it but Funk throws Lawler into it. Funk fires away with rights and sends Lawler to the floor. Funk now with a piledriver on the floor. They are heading towards the entrance way and Funk hits another piledriver. Simon Diamond comes from the back and hands something to Lawler. Lawler nails Funk and we see that he has barbed wire around his first. Funk is busted open. Funk is bleeding hard. Lawler continues to punch Funk with the wire and rake it across his face. Lawler poking Funk in the eye with the barbs. Funk fights back and we clip the match to Funk sending Lawler into the corner. Funk follows in and Lawler trips him and puts his feet on the ropes and gets the win. 10.37 is shows. Anderson and Diamond hit the ring and throw Funk out. Lawler asks for his money but Diamond says they weren’t paying Lawler to beat him in a match they were paying him to take Funk out. Lawler demands his money but Diamond again says no. They should probably just go beat up Funk together. Lawler attacks the Extreme Horsemen and hits the with stunners. They guy in the mask comes back out and they beat down Lawler. Funk and Lawler shove each other and fight over who gets to go in the ring to fight the Extreme Horsemen. They both go in and fight off the Horsemen. Funk kills the masked man with a chair and goes after the mask but then another masked man comes out with a chair and nails Lawler and Funk. Sandman and Williams come out and get rid of the Horsemen. Funk and Lawler roll around on the mat and choke each other. Funk says he hates Lawler and will never forgive him for taking out his eye. Sandman gets on the mic and tries to get them to drink a beer together and end this. Simon Diamond comes back out and makes a War Games match for September. Lawler gets on the mic and tells Funk that he hates him and will always hate him. Lawler says he wants to teach Diamond and Anderson and lesson and will team with Funk. This match was awful and the end part was equally as bad.
My thoughts on the show…
Ehh I guess mildly recommended. The tag title and main event match were not good at all. Sabu Daniels didn’t live up to what I thought it would. Mostly every thing else was passable. Sonjay Dutt put on a hell of show tonight.
