WWWF All-Star Wrestling Reviews 05-13-78

Ladies and gentlemen… The Golden Terror.

WWWF ALL-STAR WRESTLING 05-13-78

All-Star Wrestling is taped from the Fieldhouse in Hamburg, Pennsylvania.
Taping date is April 26, 1978. Your announcer is Vince McMahon.

Wow does Joe McHugh stretch out the intros sometimes.THIS is one of those times.[spacer height=”20px”]

MATCH #1: WWWF TAG TEAM CHAMPIONS DINO BRAVO & DOMINIC DENUCCI VS. TANK PATTON & THE GOLDEN TERROR

 

 

 

 

[spacer height=”20px”]On paper this looks like a competitive TV match. Let’s see how it plays out on screen. DeNucci and Terror exchange holds to start things off. Dominic finds himself on his back and tags in Bravo. Terror botches a Bravo leapfrog by not ducking, but Dino still hits a backdrop and a slam which sends the Terror to the heel corner. In comes the big Tank. Vince is impressed that Bravo easily bench presses over 400 pounds on average. Maybe they should make that into a segment on a Network special in 10 years…

DeNucci tags in and picks up where Bravo left off. The Terror is back in and getting his ass handed to him. DeNucci whips Terror into Bravo on the apron. DeNucci when catapults the Terror into the corner and Dino nails him again. Tank Patton comes in to stop the count. The champs work over the Terror in the face corner, BRAVO SPINS TERROR’S MASK AROUND, HE CAN’T SEE!!!! LOL.

The Terror comes out of the corner swinging blindly at anything, but gets nailed by DeNucci. Patton finally tags in but he gets more of the same. Dino with a nice dropkick on Tank, and Terror is right back in. A dropkick to the Terror as well. And ANOTHER dropkick by Dino. DeNucci tags in, AIRPLANE SPIN on the Golden Terror for the win after 6:23.

Then after the match Patton AND DeNucci try to help keep Terror on his feet, but the masked man is too dizzy and takes a slow fall on his face. LOL

Winners are DeNucci & Bravo

Notes: A couple of fun comedy spots by Pete Doherty here under the mask as the Golden Terror. The match was fine, Patton tagged in twice for a total of maybe 20 seconds of ring time. Doherty was the work horse in this match.[spacer height=”20px”]

 

MATCH #2: GEORGE “THE ANIMAL” STEELE VS. GENE CRESPO

 

 

 

 

[spacer height=”20px”]Steele makes his WWWF All-Star Wrestling return. George starts the match on the floor, wearing the same shirt he’d be seen in at WrestleMania IV TEN YEARS LATER. Referee Willie Webber checks Steele for the often used foreign object early on, George hides it in his mouth as he has been known to do. Steele pops Crespo with the taped object as the first sign of offense. Steele dumps Crespo out of the ring upside down backwards. The Animal rams Crespo into the ring post. Steele reverts back to using his foreign object, just for the hell of it. Webber continues to search Steele but can’t find the object as George keeps hiding it in different places after every use. Vince makes mention of Steele’s green tongue. More choking and foreign object use by the Animal. Steele bites Crespo’s arm. FLYING HAMMERLOCK ENDS THIS in 5:31.

Steele goes after Crespo’s arm post match before making love to a turnbuckle.

Winner is the Animal

 

 

 

 

[spacer height=”20px”]Notes: The offense was a little monotonous but nothing too bad. Steele was a pretty damn good heel. It proved to be a genius idea to turn an aging Steele babyface and use his character as a beloved fan favorite to the kids. Steele embraced his baby face run and worked it well, but his time as heel was clearly where he really made some money on top. It was a great character, both physically to look at but also in Steele’s mannerisms and ring work as an “Animal”.[spacer height=”20px”]

 

RINGSIDE INTERVIEW WITH LOU ALBANO & GEORGE STEELE

Vince McMahon is with the Captain and the Animal. Lou communicates with Steele. Next is probably one of my favorite lines ever as Vince asks Albano about Steele’s green tongue. Albano explains the origin of George Steele’s green tongue… It’s a “scientific fact” that WHEN AROUSED some people will produce a SECRETION from their pancreas. It comes up through the esophagus and coats the tongue green. THIS IS A FACT a green secretion WHEN AROUSED. Apparently turnbuckles make George Steele HORNY… Which explains a lot if you look at the facials he makes here in the 70’s when groping the buckles.

Albano seems to go blank as he starts searching for things to say. Blassie isn’t alone in singling out the fat ringside fan, Albano makes mention of him as well. Albano says Steele challenges Bravo, Gorilla, Zbyszko, Putski, Dusty Rhodes, DeNucci, Backlund. We run out of time as Albano goes nowhere with his promo, and I will never look at that green tongue the same way EVER again.[spacer height=”20px”]

 

MATCH #3: THE YUKON LUMBERJACKS (w/LOU ALBANO) VS. SPECIAL DELIVERY JONES & CHARLIE BROWN

SD Jones holds his own against Pierre as things get started. Charlie Brown tags in and soon finds himself in trouble against the Lumberjacks. Eric tags in and he just mauls Brown, very reminiscent of a Bruiser Brody style offense from Eric (Scott Irwin). Really nice jumping elbowdrop from Eric. The Lumberjacks dominate Brown for several minutes before he can get a hot tag to Jones. SD comes in a house of fire on Eric, stunning him with a series of heabutts. SD makes a mistake and tags back to Charlie Brown. Brown tries to come in and take over, but Eric just begins NO SELLING everything Charlie is doing. Brown tries to trade blows with Eric, but Eric is having no part of selling it. A tag to Pierre and the Lumberjacks nail Brown with the double-double axe chop for the win after 5:26.

Winners are the Lumberjacks

Notes: This was a simple paint by numbers squash. Jones held his own for his brief moments in the ring, while Brown was used as the rag doll. Scott Irwin was really impressive here in 1978 as a big man. Another solid squash by the future tag team champions, the Lumberjacks.[spacer height=”20px”]

 

MATCH #4: “THE IRON GREEK” SPIROS ARION (w/FRED BLASSIE) VS. PETE AUSTIN

Austin is starting to make his Wildman transformation, as he’s now permed his hair and is growing a beard. His new look doesn’t seem to help him much here as Arion chokes Austin repeatedly over the ropes. Finally, Pete has enough and begins coming at Arion with some right hands and an Irish whip, but Austin runs into a boot from Spiros and we’re right back to the choking over the ropes. Spiros eventually jerks Austin up for the over the shoulder backbreaker, but Austin is a big boy and Spiros can’t even get him up all the way. Austin hangs upside down as the referee rushes to call for the bell and Arion dumps Austin right on his head. Match was 3:38.

Winner is The Iron Greek

Notes: That was awful. How do you suck THAT BAD in a match that short? Not only was the match terrible, but Arion tries to pull off a strongman move against a large opponent, and when he can’t get him up right he just drops him on his head. CRAP.[spacer height=”20px”]

 

MATCH #5: HAYSTACKS CALHOUN, LARRY ZBYSZKO, PETER MAIVIA VS. BUTCHER VACHON, STRONG KOBAYASHI, MOOSE MONROE

 

 

 

 

[spacer height=”20px”]You might remember this match from the old “Most Unusual Matches” VHS tape. This match on Coliseum Video was how I got my first look at essentially everyone involved in this match, besides Zbyszko. Well no, there was the whole Butcher Vachon TNT wedding, I suppose. Zbyszko and Vachon start things out. Nothing happens here. So Kobayashi tags in and Larry gives him a couple of armdrags, sending Koby out of the ring. Haystacks and the Moose tag in. Calhoun grabs a full nelson on Monroe and allows Larry to take a cheap shot. Calhoun with a couple of belly splashes in the corner before he bearhugs Monroe.

Zbyszko has a short stint against the Moose before tagging Maivia. The High Chief comes in and lands a GUTBUSTER on the Moose and tags right back to Calhoun. Haystacks comes in for the GIANT SPLASH and this thing is over in only 3:27.

During the cover, but Zbyszko and Maivia took turns standing on the back of Calhoun, as if he needed the added helps. Larry and Maivia block Vachon & Kobayashi from interfering Haystacks got the win.

Winners are Haystacks, Larry Z, and the High Chief.

Notes: Well that was…. short. Maivia came in for one move, Larry did the lion’s share of the work, if there is such a thing in a 3 minute match. Then, Haystacks came in and gave the people what they were waiting for, the big splash got the win. It was neat to see the pairing of Maivia and Calhoun together, but they never really interacted. This match gave the people the only move they cared about in this match, the Calhoun splash, so on that level the match was a success. As a match it never really got going.[spacer height=”20px”]

Oh-ho-ho, but this show isn’t over yet!!!

With 4 minutes of TV time remaining we’re treated to an INTERVIEW WITH HAYSTACKS CALHOUN & LARRY ZBYSZKO

Larry and Calhoun explain the complications of a 6-man tag. Calhoun says the BIG SPLASH STILL WORKS. Indeed. Calhoun says he forgets to watch his back because guys like Larry and Maivia watch it for him. Larry talks about their “Statue of Liberty” spot where Calhoun splashes a man and Larry stands on his back. Larry says it’s a salute to America…. Then Vince asks Calhoun to explain the “Doggy in the Window” spot… LOL. WTF. Calhoun explains it’s an old (children’s) song. Apparently the move  involves Haystacks partner hitting an opponent then crawling through Haystacks legs to hide while Calhoun protects them… LOL. He named THAT? Sounds more like a Andre spot, or a big guy and midget spot.

Haystacks explains the origin of the Big Splash. He used to go down to the creek as a young man and he would jump in the creek “and splash the creek dry”. LOL. Haystacks also brings up his old segments when he used to splash and break 2×12’s. That was a fun way to end the show.[spacer height=”20px”]

 

Closing Thoughts: I thought the opening tag match was what you’d expect from a fairly competitive TV match, and the Golden Terror was a hoot. I’ve been enjoying the Lumberjacks thus far with their smash mouth snug work as the top heel team. Albano explaining Steele’s green tongue by insisting it’s from being “aroused” was classic Lou talking out of his ass. While not much of a match I enjoyed seeing the Animal here, same can be said for Haystacks giving us the splash. I even liked Calhoun getting promo time at the end of the show as I haven’t seen much of Haystacks on the mike. He clearly wasn’t short for words. Probably the best show so far based on the number of segments I found enjoyable. The only segment on this show I strongly disliked was Spiros Arion, who somehow managed to keep his job for the rest of the year.

Signing off for this edition of the Retro Rasslin’ Review… 10-4, over and out, goody buddy.